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Galaxian Chronicles book one Chapt One by Omnimaster (critique requested)

Galaxian Chronicles book one Chapt One

Galaxian Chronicles book one; the Gathering

Chapter One

The Figure woke in a decorated room in a bed with furnishings had golden bits and frills on them. Outside the window the weather outside was snowing softly. “Am I dead…or……” thought the young male, his face was a mix of a wolf and snow leopard, with the wolf being more present besides the one stripe on each side of his long muzzle, his hair was Semi long reaching the middle of his back, the right side of his hair is silver, the left black, the tattoo on his tail trailed up his back ending in flames in a semicircle on his neck from behind, his fur was dark grey with a white underbelly. His Eyes were stunning shade of dark blue in his right eye, but his left eye was scarred and blood red. His body was standard for a warrior, medium build without showing too much muscle.

Glaring through the sun, he began to sit up, feeling pressure on his stomach, looking down at the point he saw bandages on him. “Bandages……? I’m that wounded……?” he thought as he stood up slowly, groaning “damn it!!” he tried not to shout. His chest had fur draping over the bandages, he shuffled to the window, looking at vast Taiga with massive mountains surrounding the castle town in a semi-circle. “A deathtrap……or…a funnel for an army……” he spoke softly to himself “I have…to warn Wuthra of Arcadia’s invasion…” he looked down the window, no good, he was in a tower and in his condition, he shouldn’t try and jump. The door was a bad idea to try and go out, he may be guarded and his luck was never good with those situations.

At that time he heard the door click and he bolted to the blind spot, claws ready, maybe if he took someone hostage, they let him go. As the door opened, he heard two voices, one was about his age and the other was young, close to teens, both however were female. He peered to a point where he wouldn’t be seen, he saw a beautiful hybrid female, her tail was really long and she was in a dazzlingly split dress with long draping sleeves, she was pure white save for the red heart beat marks on her thighs and ankle and the tips of her long ears were bright red, she is probably his age, her build was short but sexy, he couldn’t help but blush at her. The other was a wolf that was just barely taller then the other, but she looked even younger, probably 14 or 15 years old, he was 18, she had gold and green eyes, with two green marks on her cheeks, her tail had a black tip and a green stripe on it, she was clad in light leather armor and a long sword at her side.

He shut the door as soon as they entered, both gasped and turned to him, the young wolf drawing her sword, barking at him “Who are you?!” he looked at the white hybrid, he saw a crown on her head, thinking “great…she’s royalty……I’m in deep shit.” The young woman put her paw on the young wolf’s sword, lowering it. “Now now…we don’t need to draw swords in this situation……we don’t know his intentions…” the white leopard spoke in a sweet toned voice, then looked at him softly “what is your name? The General that brought you here said you were attack by almost an army of Arcadians…you must be strong and important that they didn’t want you to escape.

The Young wolf flinched; his name would give him away. He bit his lip softly and spoke at length to them “Omni…Torch…” his voice was shy, never needing to introduce himself before someone like her. “that’s royalty…are you sure you that is your name?” the young wolf accused, Omni looked away, not wanting to answer then the White leopard spoke “my name is Lina Carr…this is Wolfy Anya Whitticar” se said softly “Wolfy…please…go bring some food and clothes for the poor man…please?” The reluctant glance from Wolfy showed slight distrust but did as she was told, Omni moved out of the door way and stood near the window until Lina looked at him with a stern look “Now……tell me who you really are and why you were pursued.” He flinched, how did she know he was lying? With a sigh he noded and looked at her with sorrow “My name is Omni Snyder…Prince and Heir to the Arcadian throne…and…Rebel against the crown…my business is with all royalty to warn them of the coming danger…”

Galaxian Chronicles book one Chapt One (critique requested)

Omnimaster

dear lord...CLIFFHANGER~ i suck >< goooooood i hope its to all of your approval

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