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Galaxian Chronicle Book One Proluge by Omnimaster (critique requested)

Galaxian Chronicle Book One Proluge

All was still at the Bordering Pillar between two countries, Arcadia, the Warring Empire and Sulphira, The Healing Realm save for the

calls of the wild forest. In the continent of Eden which belongs to the planet of Galaxia, Eden was Split in three Pieces by great ravines, each having

a single pillar as the border, Known as Bordering Pillars. A figure robed in black darted down the path, an audible splash of a puddle under feet echoed

in the dim forest. Following the figure was five Arcadians and their war machine, an ACM Rover Scorpion. Among the Arcadians were two Dogs with gleaming

Broadsword, two Cats with combat assult rifles, and a Black Knight wolf with a great sword in hand. The Hooded Figure glared back at them and he growled

low, his Blue and Red eyes glaring at them, his fangs flashing, his grey ears tipped with black go flat, his grey long and shaggy tail twitching angerly

at them, it was decorated with a black tattoo going from his tail tip to the base. The ACM lashed its tail at a nearby tree, trying to block his path

the Figure growled “SHIT!!!” as he ducked under and through before the tree even crushed the tip of his tail, his voice was cold and curt, but sound

young and hiding sorrow in it.

The ACM quick hit the Figure with its tail, sending him flying into a tree ten feet away from the path, the dogs began to charge at the figure, swords

poised to kill. As the first dog leap into the air to kill him, the figure caught his hand and quick drew a double barreled Revolver and pulled the

trigger, making a noise that was loud like thunder overhead. The dog hurled himself back due to pain, his screams gurgling as blood filled his mouth.

The figure grabbed the dog’s sword, and rushed the other dog, showing strong swordsmanship, lopping the dog’s sword hand off and thrusting the sword

into the forehead of the dog.

The Cats began to panic; one yelled at the Knight “How are we supposed to beat a general?!” the Knight silenced them and sent the ACM to attack the

Figure, its tail hitting the sword out of his paw, the Knight spoke “By hitting him with his weakness…” As the ACM tail was thrusting to the figure,

his vision went blurry, then it went white as he woke from the memory, blinded by light….

Galaxian Chronicle Book One Proluge (critique requested)

Omnimaster

Moderate for violence for the prolouge

GIVE ME HONEST OPINION PLEASE

Submission Information

Views:
154
Comments:
14
Favorites:
1
Rating:
General
Category:
Literary / Story

Comments

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    wags tail-

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      -he smiled softly- you get in the first chapter, along with savvy since she is you tecnical bodyguard in the story ><

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        heh yay

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          -he kissed her hard- your review time

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            XD i will once i get home my love, im bout to chagne classes