I honestly have no idea anymore…I know this will probably come off as just another whiny "furry drama" journal entry, but I'm just kind of feeling terrible and like a whiny mooch right now. v.v

I'm on two furry art sites, follow a bunch of artists on Twitter, can afford none of them for commissions, and I have basically zero discernable art skill of my own, so like, what am I doing here, anyway? x.x I feel like I'm just mooching off the work of these artists by faving, saving, and moving on to the next round of submission notifications like they're nothing. I feel like I need to actually give back somehow if I'm to be considered a "real" part of this community.

Don't get me wrong; when I say "moving on to the next round of notifications like they're nothing", I don't mean to say I find the majority of the things I find bland or uninteresting, it's just that…well I do take "favorite" very literally, and I've become increasingly picky about what I add to that list/archive. I just feel bad right now because I'm basically coming to terms with the fact that hey, this is essentially an entire ecosystem of artists and commissioners here, and I'm like, not even a part of it because I basically have no life, and no self-confidence to get started on building one for myself, either.

Another discouraging thing is that I tend to be more interested in building fictional worlds than creating individual "pieces" that represent discrete ideas or suchlike. I mean, I definitely like discrete ideas when they're apropos, but I just get the feeling that if I were gonna "bring a world to life" it'd get exhausting and/or expensive really fast (depending on whether I went the DIY or commish route, or both).

Basically, TL;DR: I feel bad for being poor/broke and not being able to do much in the way of actively participating in a community full of artists; I feel like I don't belong and that I'm just here to mooch. :/