I feel like it's been a bit since I've posted any journals that aren't super business related. I have also gotten a number of new watchers since FAU, so I'd like to just, I dunno, be a person for a bit. If you have any questions, shoot. They can be personal, or work related, or art related, or w/e. If the question makes me uncomfortable, I'll just leave it be, no harm done, so ask away.

Some basic info about the me right now:

I'm really fucking excited about Halloween and October in general. It's my favourite month and my favourite holiday. I want to be doing the Inktober challenge, but it's been hard to make time for it between commissions and personal stuff.

Hopefully soon, I'll be through my commission queue. On my Trello, you can see a lot of people in my waiting list, even besides the people who are currently paid and actively getting art from me. I've been making an effort to talk to other artists about how they handle their queue, and it seems the consensus is that I take on WAY too many at a time. Most of them seem to take on 3-5 projects, get them done, then fill up again. This allows for people to get their art soon after they ask for it, and for the initial idea they wanted to not get stale or need to be changed. I've been taking upwards of 20+ at a time, ha haaaaa. So once this is cleared out, I'll be doing it that way, and I'm looking forward to the relief.

I went to an apple orchard recently, and bought one of the last bags of honey crisp apples. These are the tastiest, loveliest apples I know. There is now only one left. Autumn is the season of fleeting seasonal delights. I've been making plenty of my yearly spiced coffee, where I throw whole cloves and cinnamon and such into the bean grinder. Such a treat~

My anxiety level is getting pretty bad lately. I am constantly wondering if I'm just a worry-wort, or if I have an actual issue that needs to be addressed. I'm going to a doctor about it on the 12th, after trying to work up the nerve to make a phone call for 26 days. Not sure what's going to come of it, but hopefully I'll figure some stuff out. I think part of my problem is that I work from home, don't know anybody in the neighborhood really, and going on walks isn't viable because I live in a very unsafe area. My car just broke down, so I can't take outings very easily, and even when I do, I'm just by myself on them, so it feels pretty lonely.

On the flip side of that, I am the happiest I've ever been. Freelance furry art has been my job for over a year now, and I am completely in love with it. I adore drawing, getting to know the people I draw for, just all of it. I can't believe I've gotten so lucky and found a source of income that can be this rewarding. Yeah, I'm not rolling in the cash (yet), but it's worth it. I also have fucking fantastic friends online who I cherish dearly. I may not be able to see them or go on outings, but it's a damn miracle I know people I can connect with this deeply. And the icing on this good-feels cake is that my mate is still amazing and caring as the day I met him. I don't know why you put up with me, bby, but holy shit thank you.

I've been considering making a journal inviting questions about my gender identity, and just gender in general. I'm genderfluid. Should I give it a go?

We recently bought a WiiU, and I am so pumped. We got the Maio Maker bundle, and that game has been a blast. Even more than that though, I'm looking forward to Bayonetta 2 <3 <3 <3 For the longest time, I thought I'd just never get to experience that treat of a game, but now, it's finally in my grasp. Pure, unadulterated witch-time-feet-gun fun.

Alright, that seems like a lot of typing, so I'm gonna stop now. Hopefully this goes a ways in pulling the illusion off me that I'm a cold, calculating art machine, or that I'm just cruising along on easy street with a car made of dick money. Yeah, I can draw, but I am full of doubts and problems just like anybody else. I mess stuff up all the time, but I'm always trying my best.