Getting Uncomfortably Close to Me by Kobi LaCroix

What's your real name?
Kobi LaCroix. That's what I call myself. It's what other people call me. It's a real name. If you want my legal name, it's Tough Shit Honey.

How tall are you?
Somewhere between a field mouse and a saguaro cactus.

What's your natural hair color?
Reddish-brown, somewhere between russet and burnt umber

What's your eye color?
potato

What's your orientation?
An amorphous, glowing cloud of sexy vapor.

Are you single, taken or undecided?
Engaged to Threetails

What do you do in your spare time?
Play the keyboard, draw, go for walks, read blogs, play with the cats, yell at the cats, listen to thrash metal, watch anime shows about kittens, and fill out inane questionnaires.

What's your job or occupation?
Freelance armchair grump. It doesn't actually pay anything, and the benefits are shit, but man, you can't beat the hours! Seriously, though, I make most of my income from art, either from music, merchandising, or commissions. Speaking of which, did I mention I'm open for commissions?

What do you like about yourself?
I can draw cartoons, sing, and play piano reasonably well. I can make people laugh. I've also been told I'm very handsome and have an epic beard (or used to; I shaved most of it off this morning).

What do you dislike about yourself?
I'm shy. I'm poor. I have anger issues. Most of my ideas are half-assed regurgitations of toxic pop-culture clichés. I have bad teeth. I have trouble figuring things out on my own. I complain too much. I'm not actually an anthropomorphic fox made of lava.

What did your friends notice about you when they first met you?
Usually it's that I'm painfully shy.

What is your belief/religion if you believe in anything at all?
I don't belong to an organized religion, though I do believe in the possibility of a higher intelligence which may or may not be called "God". So, agnostic, I guess.

Do you drink?
Only socially

Do you smoke?
Only when I'm flaming, dear.

What are your major fears?
I keep those locked away in my subconscious so I don't have to think about them.

Do you have any dreams or goals?
All I care about is getting the next project done and making enough to survive the year.

Have you ever had a crush or an ex?
I've had crushes on girls in grade school, and I've fooled around with people online, but I'm still with the first person I ever had a real romantic relationship with.

Who's your best buddy?
Oh no, I'm not playing that game.

What's your favorite dish?
Give me a burrito with all the veggies, ever. Extra habanero salsa and guacamole.

What's your favorite drink?
Blenheim ginger ale. An exceptionally spicy ginger ale that's extremely hard to come by these days. The company seems to have a tendency to blink in and out of existence.

What's your favorite color?
Right now I'm partial to yellow and orange.

If you had a super power, what would it be?
*points to the folder marked "Kobi"*

What's your favorite movie?
"Airplane!"

What's your least favorite food?
Play-doh…Oh, that's not food? NOW YOU TELL ME!!!

What's the last meal you want before you die?
Don't waste your time. Save that meal for someone who needs it.

What do you drive and what would you really like to drive?
I don't drive, and I hope I never have to. Car ownership needs to be phased out ASAP. If I need to go anywhere, it's train, bus, or walk. Possibly bicycle if I can ever afford it.

What is your most disliked bug?
The secret Outer Space Skunk Army listening device embedded somewhere in this room. I KNOW YOU'RE THERE!

What is your biggest pet peeve?
Inane questionnaires

What do you dislike in life?
People who value traditions and institutions over actual human beings.

Getting Uncomfortably Close to Me

Kobi LaCroix

22 January 2014 at 17:46:54 MST

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  • Link

    I should keep that last meal one in mind if that ever becomes an unfortunate decision I have to make. It's like filling the car's gas tank all the way up just for a short drive to the junk yard.

  • Link

    "A burrito with all the veggies, ever"? Are you a vegetarian?

    • Link

      Not strictly, but I like to try vegetarian dishes now and then.

  • Link

    I love your attitude towards answering... all of these. xD