to what you ask? to my whereabouts.

see things havent been too good for me lately and ive been pretty down for at least a couple of weeks now, do i cross the line and say im depressed? i dont know, but im sure not happy.

me and my partner have it rough lately, and as much as people are telling me to not fear the worst, i still do. six months would have been wasted, lots of money and good laughs and memories just down the toilet.. i cry just thinking about the worst case scenario there. also my grandfather recently took a turn for the worse and is very ill, so i worry about him a lot as hes the relative i always called when i felt like i had no one else, and he could always make me smile again. my parents constantly fight with each other and im always having to break up their fights as well as my own, all while being fired from my job right before xmas and having no money to buy any gifts. or do anything. no one is helping me with money now.

ive boycotted facebook completely in an attempt to feel better. out of sight out of mind, as it were. i stay here on weasyl because nothing is bad here. and im sorry ive not been very active but when youre like this, the last thing you want to do is draw - ive been drawing, but very little, and mainly vent art which im not the sort to go and upload it, yknow with some whiney song lyrics in the description etc, no no i just dont do that.

i dont need hugs, i dont need advice, i dont need pity, i just wanted to inform you all of why ive been a bit distant lately. why my art has not been too high in volume lately. why im kinda quiet i guess.

to those i owe art, i will get round to it. i have the LondonFurs winter party to look forward to on Saturday december 14th, and if all is well with my relationship status by then, i should be attending and will feel refreshed and much better after it. just knowing that myself and him wouldnt be over, and none of my efforts and patience and work would be wasted, and i was still loved, would make all the rest of the things i have to worry about feel pale and less painful than they are right now.

which of course, will give me a good enough mood to draw stuff. if it all goes successfully. if not then i really dont know what ill do. but im trying to not think of that case.

so bear with me guys, ive not forgotten anybody and everyone will get what they need soon enough.