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Elements by Valentine (critique requested)

I can’t see the city, through all the debris,

Maybe it’s from the earthquake inside of me.

The earth is moving, it’s shaking so hard

My soul, unlike my body, beaten, bruised, and scarred

Every time I daydream, I’m looking at the sky

And every night I’m sleeping, I always wonder why

Was it ‘cause of me, because I wasn't good enough

When I did whatever it was you needed, how could you be so rough

Thinking of what was, should I be feeling free?

How could you leave when you mean so much to me?

It’s not my fault, you were never there

Where is life’s pause, because it’s just not fair.

I used to watch you dancing, from up such great heights,

Now I feel blinded, from the strongest floodlights.

I can’t think about those times, without feeling sick

It had started, it’s over, my god that was quick.

Thinking of what was, should I be feeling free?

How could you leave when you mean so much to me?

It’s not my fault, you were never there

Where is life’s pause, because it’s just not fair.

This feels like a burn, of the highest degree

If you had to choose something, why couldn't it be me?

It’s not my fault, you were never there

Where is life’s pause, because it’s just not fair.

Though life’s getting better, though it’s not there yet

But if I could tell you one thing, I've got no regrets

Elements (critique requested)

Valentine

A song I wrote back around February 2011, I think most likely for February Album Writing Month (Fawm) and discovered it again.

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Literary / Poetry / Lyrics