If I die in this world

Who will know something of me?
I am lost, no one knows
There's no trace of my yearning
If I die in this world (but I must carry on)
Who will know something of me? (Nothing worse can befall)
I am lost, no one knows (all my fears, all my tears)
There's no trace of my yearning (tell my heart there's a hole)
I wear a void
Not even hope
A downward slope
Is all I see
I wear a void (as long as breath comes from my mouth)
Not even hope (I may yet stand the slightest chance)
A downward slope (a shaft of light is all I need)
Is all I see (to cease the darkness killing me)

I'm obviously still depressed, and when I'm depressed, sometimes my characters also suffer; I hate it, but I don't know how else to express myself. Yesterday was the service where we said our final goodbyes to my mom, and even though I know I have to accept what happened, I haven't gotten any better; going through 2 human losses and 3 pet losses has really messed me up. All I can do is move on, and pretend that I'm happy, and everything is fine, but it will never be the same. Ultimately, I'm starting to believe that I've officially lost what very little was left of my sanity, because I began seeing and hearing things, and I can't tell if it's just some kind of vision, or I'm actually mentally declining, but my lord, I need a therapist badly.