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Sometimes I'm very tired (Ranting, ignore me)

My depression has been hitting me hard as of late. The past few months have seen wonderful changes. I started a relationship with someone I've liked for a long time, my Spouse, partner and I finally got a new apartment. This place is much nicer than the last, and ends up cheaper too.

But then other things come up. I can't be in the new relationship any more (please don't ask why), our cat passed away about two months ago. And I find myself utterly flattened by them. Every small mishap gets blown out of proportion in my head. It's a struggle for me to keep going and I find myself thinking of death and yet being utterly terrified of dying. I've spoken with both partner and spouse about these feelings but all it seems to do is make them upset and worried. So I just feel stressed, because now I'm not only a financial burden, I'm an emotional one too.

I realize that these feelings are irrational, but that doesn't stop the anxiety, it doesn't stop the feelings of despair and worthlessness. I'm just so tired.

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