The Two sat in the graveyard. A mental scape depicting the lives of friendships never made. Encounters pushed aside in favor of solitude. The moon hung in the sky in an eclipse. A faint red glow giving the place a gloomy, yet inviting presence. 

In this space, The Raven and the Horse sat. 


"Do you ever wonder why he does it?" The Raven, Visia, stared up at the moon while the Horse laid back against her, lost in thought. 

"No."  He said out of bitter defiance. A brief pause in the gloom was all it took to erode his defenses into curiousity.

".....Does what?" 

"Brings us here. Your mental scape. You're always here ,but having Master help me visit you is.... odd I guess?"

"it doesn't seem like something that would benefit him." He wrapped his arms around his knees.

"Maybe that's part of the point. I'm his good girl. And as part of my headspace, you're part of that. there's a little of obedience in you too. but you fight him all the time. or at the very least act like you don't want anything to do with him." Visia turned back a little to look at him over her shoulder.

"I don't." 

"Why?"

"Because you do." 

Another long pause of silence. 

"I don't know why Master put up with us for so long. but maybe all that self loathing, all those doubts that we weren't worth a damn... Maybe it all went into you, so I could enjoy myself.  The longer we serve him, the less and less we've found reason to... well... hate ourselves." 

"That's all I am. That hate. that self doubt. the part that wants to be left the fuck alone so we can just die already." 

"But even you can admit that since he showed up, everything's been... better. Not perfect. but better."

"..."

"you can't even say it, can you? Do you think he wins if you admit that?"

"...Maybe." 

"Why do you want him to lose?"

the Horse, Eclipse, stood up and paced. 

"I don't fucking know! because maybe if he wins I stop being me and just end up as more of you. Maybe I'm what we actually are and you're this... thing he made! You ever think about that? That amongst all your sexy times and sessions and encouragement to be better we're becoming less of who we were? It's bullshit! He's bullshit."  

Eclipse walked away. An entirely futile gesture given the entire world around them was as mental construct but it was the body language that was important to him. Visia slowly got up and approached. The Raven reached to the Horse, and he clutched his arm. 

"There's a lot of times I think about that. That he might have just been stringing us up to be some pretty thing to play with. That maybe he was manipulating us from the beginning so we'd be something to whet his appetite. But..." 

She nestled next to him again, holding him in a hug.

"He wouldn't have put up with us for as long as he did if all he wanted was a toy. He wanted something more than that out of us. Wanted something we never thought we could ever be. No amount of his dominance would have convinced us of it if it wasn't... at least... a little real."

"and what was that?" Eclipse folded his arms, but didn't retreat from the Raven. 

She leaned closer and whispered into his ear. 

"He wanted us to be better. To be happy with who we are." 

"He just  wants you to fit in this pretty cage of his."

"If he did, wouldn't he have gotten rid of you by now? wouldn't he have not encouraged these visits?" 

Eclipse thought about that long and hard. 

"....will you stay a little longer this time?" 

The Raven gave a long sigh and hugged the Horse.

"Always."

For once, the moonlight felt a bit warmer.

_____________________________________________________

Visia and Eclipse are a peculiar thing. Deep in visia's mind there are aspects of the self. and eclipse is the part of her that deeply sought an end to the suffering she endured. but then she met me, and things felt a bit warmer. 

I've known Visia for a few years now. and while the time we spent has indeed had plenty of fun, there is seldom a point I am not encouraging her to do better. to expect better. To live better. 

Last week, I rode with her from her original home where she wasn't accepted for who she was, and helped her move to a place where she could be herself. She now lives with four other people who love and accept her for who she is. It was quite a journey, but it was worth it. She kept telling me she was in disbelief, that at some point the vacation would end and she'd have to go back to her old life. Eight months ago, this wasn't even an idea in her head. Now it's fully realized. sometimes you need someone to give you hope. 

I hope your life gets better from here, Visia. you're worthy of happiness.

you always were. 

I'll visit her again sometime soon. 

Artwork of Misterwolf1.0
Art by Gardenkaiser