finally picked up my tablet and doodled something . a slightly sad saxon though ahah but i also at least was practicing colors again. bleh.

this is also kind of a vent art. i joined armonia a long while back and helped out when it first began and well i know myself better obviously than anyone else and i just have always felt bad about my tendancies to get spur of the moment draw everythings and then suddenly nothing.

i've done this a lot with groups in the past, but i dunno i guess it's like i want to come back and i want to chat with friends but at the same time i don't really feel worthy about coming back and i'm actually terrified of re entering the chat room because i've been away for so long and obviously without communication with one another and with the friends i made there it's kind of hard to try and rekindle things.

and i mean i'm happy at least that i can talk to some without feeling like too much has changed. kinda. i like that it's okay i can pop in and out but i still feel pretty guilty and shitty about it.