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Comfort in the Quiet - Chapter 1 "Begin" by 2m2h (critique requested)

Comfort in the Quiet - Chapter 1 "Begin"

Chris gaps for air, suddenly realizing that he's been asleep. It was probably one of the best nights he's had though. He's always been on edge since the infection spread, that he never slept very well. Not realizing that he had fallen asleep had him not worrying about whether or not he'd be attacked while his eyes were closed. He felt reborn.

Chris looks around the room. It seems to be about 10am. He notices that Lily is still leaned against him. He shifts his position to make himself a bit more comfortable, but it seems to be bothering the slumbering Lily.

"Lily... Hey... Yeah, my arm's numb."

"Ohhkayy..."

She shifts to her other side, still mostly unconscious.

"Oh shit! Chris!"

Her head quickly turns towards the door. She scrambles to her hands and knees.

"We fell asleep! Fuck! No one was on watch!"

She surveys her entire body for anything unusual. No bite marks, no cuts or scratches. She releases a sigh of relief.

"Lily, it's okay. Look. All the chairs and stuff are still in the same place."

"Fucking- ...that scared the shit out of me. "

"But we should get out of here. Sleepers aren't stupid. They know we're still in here."

"Alright..."

They take a few minutes to gather the things they threw on the floor in their frantic return to the room. Chris begins moving the chairs out of the way of the door. They work together to move the huge desk as quietly as possible.

"Alright. Once these boards are off, we're vulnerable. Get ready, Chris."

The doors are opened and the two of them slowly walk out, both looking in either direction while gripping their guns. It's another cold, cloudy day.

"Clear so far over here, Chris."

"Same."

They take a few more cautionary steps towards the center of the plaza. This plaza consists of only a few stores and offices that expands to a large parking lot. Most of the stores went out of business long before the spread of the infection had started, making it a huge deserted area. They were hiding in a small office.

"Okay. I think we're good. Let's head out to the street."

"Lily, behind us! 4 of them!"

Sleepers have slipped out from being various objects. The two begin running to the street. The Sleepers follow their lead and run after them.

"Chris! We don't have any place to hide this time! Even if we go in somewhere, we don't even know if it's empty!"

Other Sleepers in the area are attracted to their yelling, increasing the original four to about eight or nine. Three of them look quite physically fit and they're closing in fast.

Lily unloads her last four bullets on the closest three, hitting each, but killing only one. More Sleepers appear after hearing the gunshots.

"Fucking hell! Lily, I don't know if we'll make it out of this!"

From their left, they hear what sounds like an engine approaching. Two people arrive in an armored Jeep.

"Get in!" A deep voice booms from the vehicle.

Chris and Lily have no choice but to comply and climb in the back. The jeep takes off at an immense speed, leaving tire tracks in the already beat up asphalt.

"You two are lucky we arrived when we did. The name's Isaac. This here is Charlie."

The one talking appeared to be a 27 year old Black man with a buzz cut. He was quite muscular. He sported a gray V-neck shirt and dark blue jeans. The younger man sat right next to him had fair skin. He wore a black trench coat on over a red shirt and gray jeans. He had short light brown hair and looked to be about 21 years old.

"We were just out scavenging for some food when we saw you two in a bad situation."

"Yeah... for a second there, I really thought we weren't going to make it out."

"Don't worry. The uninfected should stick together."

There was a short silence within the group and no Sleepers were visible in any direction. It was calm. The jeep kept driving until it reached what looked like some sort of large cafeteria on the middle of a parking lot. It was boarded up from every angle and it didn't give off a very inviting vibe. There was an opening on the far side of the building. They entered the opening and a garage door closed behind them.

Chris and Lily don't seem too impressed.

"Make yourselves at home. It's not much to see, but it works. The Sleepers don't even come near this place."

Upon taking a better look at Isaac and Charlie, Isaac was about 6 foot 3 inches tall. Charlie is 5 foot 9 inches, same as Chris, and has a scar on the right side of his face stretching from his forehead to his ear.

The group enter a huge dimly lit room room from the garage. There aren't a lot of lights, but everything is still moderately visible. It has tables, benches and working appliances. Another room off to the left appears to be their sleeping quarters.

Never mind not being impressed. This place is much better than they can ever do. The place they just ran away from didn't even have lights and only one window.

"So, you two, what are your names?"

"Chris."

"Liliana."

They shake hands with each other.

"Already introduced myself and Charlie."

There's a girl sat at a table in the back with a light directly over it. The table has a bunch of trinkets and tools on it. She looks up to reveal a face with a few grease marks. A blonde, wearing a maroon tank top and brown shorts. Fingerless gloves are on her hands which are also spotted with grease and black work boots are on her feet. Her body is toned, but not muscular.

She stands up and joins the group. She appears to be about 5 foot 8 inches, just two inches taller than Lily. Her ethnicity is given away by her British accent.

"I'm Nicole, our own personal weapons expert. It's nice to meet someone who isn't infected or trying to kill us for our resources. Don't worry about introducing yourselves again. I heard."

Chris suddenly realizes something.

"Weapons expert? My Mosin Nagant has been jammed for about two days now."

"Bolt action, huh? Not the ideal kind of weapon for our situation, but it does have quite a bit of power. Bring it over to the table. I'll take a look at it."

They walk over to the table talking about different types of guns and what they prefer.

Isaac begins a formal introduction.

"Well, as I said before, my name's Isaac. Charlie's right here and you just meet Nicole. Charlie here is our tech specialist. He's actually quite good. He doesn't talk much though. We almost thought he was a Sleeper at first just on that fact alone. And me, I'm the mechanic. That beauty in the garage is a result of my handiwork. We've got another vehicle I'm working on over in that room back there on the left."

Lily is still standing around awkwardly. It's been a while since she could let loose and not worry about being killed. Plus, it's been about two months since her and Chris met anyone unaffected by the virus.

"You two look young. How old are you both."

Lily replies. She has to answer for Chris as well.

"18. Chris is 19. What about you guys?"

Isaac feels really old again.

"I'm 25."

"20."

This was the first time Lily has heard Charlie say anything. He has a light German accent.

"Nicole over there is 19, too."

Isaac starts walking towards the table closest to the kitchen.

"Y'all hungry? We got some stuff right before we swooped in and saved you guys."

"Oh, yeah. Um... Thanks... Oh, if it means anything, we found some cans of food yesterday."

Lily pulls out the three cans out of her bag and puts them on the counter. It's a can of tomato sauce and two cans of peaches.

"Hey, we really appreciate what you guys are doing for us. The last person who tried to 'save' us ended up trying to kill us. Turns out he had been bitten by the Sleepers."

"Don't worry about it. Like Nicole said, we've had the same problem."

Chris comes back with a smile on his face.

"That girl is amazing with guns. Turns out that the barrel is super dirty and rusty. Bullets weren't going in smoothly. Makes sense now why it was tough to load. Eventually the bolt hit the right spot and didn't want to go anywhere. She's got another Mosin Nagant that she'll fix mine with."

Isaac returns from deeper in the kitchen.

"Alright, so, we got a few choices for lunch. Some macaroni and cheese or chicken noodle soup. Oh, and by the way, I'm also the chef around here."

Nicole quickly looks up and yells from across the room excitedly.

"Mac and cheese!!"

Isaac smiles and returns to the back of the kitchen. Charlie speaks up.

"While we're on the topic of food. Just to be clear, we could have left you two there to be a nice meal for those Sleepers, but according to Isaac, it's 'the more, the merrier'. You two better not slack off and waste our space while you're here. Now, you tell me your skills, and I'll tell you where we'll put you to work."

Chris and Lily suddenly are overcome with an unbecoming vibe.

"Um... I used to draw a lot."

"I- I really like science."

"Girl. Any interest in physics or maths?"

"No."

Charlie has a scowl on his face. He points to Chris.

"What area of science?"

"Chemistry."

"You could be useful. But you, girl, unless you have an interest in physics and excel in math, that skill won't be needed. We could use you for blueprints or concept art and such. But no."

Lily's face is still, but her heart sinks. Isaac quickly returns from the back.

"Hey! Whoa whoa! Don't be mean, Charlie. Hey, Liliana. He can be a bit harsh, but he's just thinking about what's best. Just in some extreme ways sometimes. I'm sure your art is amazing."

Lily's heart is slightly mended by Isaac's uplifting words. Isaac returns to the back to finish the macaroni. There's an awkward silence. All that's heard is Isaac's whistling and the sound of Nicole's tools being taken out of her toolbox.

Chris backs up and heads over to Nicole. Lily walks around looking at what there is to see around the place. Before they know it, the food is ready. Everyone grabs their portion and sits at a large round table. Isaac asks a question.

"So what do you two know about Sleepers?"

Chris responds very unsure of himself.

"Just what we've heard on the news."

"Well, you know, they don't only eat other humans. They eat meat, vegetables, and everything the uninfected do."

Nicole's face becomes very serious.

"I've also seen Sleepers eating other Sleepers."

"Mhmm. That means they HAVE to eat to stay alive. Just like us. Therefore, it's a fight for food. Not just with the healthy, but with the Sleepers too."

Chris and Lily nod.

The meal is finished and people go back to what they were previously doing. Chris and Lily are in the back with Nicole. By now, it's about 4pm.

Isaac comes out with a few board games.

"Who wants to pass the time?"

Nicole is elated. She shoots up from the table and bounds over to Isaac. Charlie puts on a slight smile. Chris and Lily join in.

They all play a 3 hour game of Monopoly and Nicole emerges victorious by everyone forfeiting. She lets out an excited yell with her arms above her head.

The day continues with everyone talking and warming up to each other. Chris and Lily still get an unsettling vibe from Charlie and his demeaning tone of voice. It approaches 10pm and people are either asleep or just beginning to go to sleep. Isaac shows Lily and Chris to the sleeping quarters.

"I think we got a few extra sleeping thingies and blankets for you two. Let me go check."

He leaves the room and returns a minute later with two rolled up sleeping bags and two folded blankets.

"Here you go."

"Thank you."

"Thanks."

"My pleasure. Get your sleep, we're getting up early. See ya guys in the morning."

They set up their sleeping bags next to each other and lie down.

"Hey, Chris?"

"Hmm?"

"This is real nice. We don't have to worry about being attacked tonight."

Chris smiles and closes his eyes.

Comfort in the Quiet - Chapter 1 "Begin" (critique requested)

2m2h

This is the first chapter following the prologue I posted earlier.

Prologue:
https://www.weasyl.com/submission/547231/comfort-in-the-quiet-prologue

Submission Information

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