I'm sorry if I haven't been social or doing anything after this con, but my really painful PCD has been affecting me all week.

I try to sleep away the days hoping for better tomorrows. My own faults pain me to no end to the point where I was in bed in tears last night.

No forgiveness, no apologies, no way to ensure I can properly move forwards seems visible on my horizon at this moment. Everyone thinks I brought it upon myself, which increases the pain I have to deal with.

All the help in the world wasn't enough this week to make me stop thinking about the pain I caused and the pain I now suffer.

I feel like nobody will be there for me due to the simple fact I brought it upon myself and that I should feel shame for what I did.

I'm lonely, I'm unloved, nobody cares for me, and all I can do is be a hermit crab for now.