ok i know ive said im not really feeling the most into it and social as of late but recent occurrences that ive witnessed in other places have made me think about some things and they are things i wish to bring up because i feel they are highly pertinent

so uh first off ill preface things with an assertion that no one should be shamed for being ignorant of lgbtqia+ concerns who are seeking information and education. this is especially important in lesser known genders and sexualities, those often pushed to the wayside due to the general binaristic societal norms a lot of us experience, speaking from a western standpoint at least. yeah, we know of male and female, gay and straight, maybe sometimes bisexual. we know about transgender people, often misunderstanding them unfortunately

this being said however i feel like...when ignorant people are asking for more clarity on the subject matter of the transgender community and the greater concept of transgenderism as an identity and what makes up this identity and how it differs for people in this community, it worries me to see a lot of words coming from cisgender people. i see words often like “i dont have a problem with trans people but i dont see enough scientific proof of dysphoria” blah blah blah “why do we put so much importance on these labels why cant we all just be people” blah blah. i see a lot of what looks like outright complaining over something that is not being fundamentally understood

it cannot be ignored that a lot of us, even queer people(i personally reclaim this word for myself), have grown up in environments that have fostered bigotry either outright, or passively in our everyday behaviors. most, if not every other queer person ive met and befriended recounts such memories of even being bigoted themselves, from what they learn from elders, to a form of misguided coping and pushing ones self away from their own identities out of fear and other negative emotions. im even included in this and cannot and will not deny that when i was younger, due to certain factors in my environment i had bigoted ideals and behaviors towards people that i very much grew into identifying with later on and currently so. thank you catholic school for that lmao

our process of acceptance and inclusion involves a lot of unlearning old ideals and mental rewiring, not too dissimilar in racial awareness and movements in the past and present day

we cannot really move forward in this learning without accepting our past faults and not mortally condemning those who are still moving forward, even if they faulter. i dont generally believe in ousting and rejecting those who take longer to wrap their heads around the ideas of queerness. its never sat well with me. we are understandably allowed to be frustrated, to be angry, to be afraid, i know i certainly feel these things sometimes when dealing with ignorant people. some people just dont get it right off the bat and ok, yea, that can be annoying as all fuck

does that mean everyone is bad in that way, then? i dont really think so, not always at least. yeah ok some people are just kind of bigoted for naught, which sucks but like. very very often i encounter people who are more of just struggling. this is my experience at the very least. ive had a certain luxury of living in a strange limbo between several areas of populations who are rather accepting and those that are rather limited and xenophobic. i know this is not the way for all places and people, but it is at least mine, and of mine i will be speaking of. perhaps some of you will be able to share similarly.

anyways, back to my first point of this being said, i still have a certain belief at least that when it does come to these sort of discussions, im not entirely sure how much cisgender people should be contributing to direct experience education and more specifically opinions about transgenderism when others are asking for information. understandably if you are cisgender and further examining that and possibly coming to a conclusion that you are not cisgender, by all means, but im more talking about the unwelcome opinions and how they try to define transgenderism. the transgender experience, though it is wholesomely unique to each individual yet still uniting of us, is essentially something that is not generally felt and experienced by the cisgender person. i do not really believe a cisgender person really has the right to state what they feel defines us because its what these definitions they create that make things admittedly difficult for us. its these kinds of decisions from cisgender people that make it a ridiculously asinine process to go through gender transition, be it socially, medically, or any other combination

that is to be considered, as well as the fact that in general a lot of cisgender people still often perpetuate transphobia and binarism, both blatantly and intentionally as well as subtly and subconsciously. it is something that cannot be avoided or brushed aside and minimized and is part of the learning process i have so talked about earlier

with that in mind its just...not really the place for a cis person to really be giving out their opinions on these sorts of things? like i understand the need for support, for allies and whatnot, for help explaining things when trans people cannot always stand up for themselves due to various reasons, but it really is the matter of knowing when to step back and let the actual people being affected to be the ones to tell of these experiences and the needs we have as human beings for our rights

tbh theres so much that can be talked about with this subject, honestly honestly its so much and such a huge scope that i understand it can be difficult. i have difficulties with it

idek

i mean while i am a pretty decently private person i do try to make an effort to be at least somewhat open with things about myself such as mental illness education and my gender and my sexuality bc these things im personally affected by i know are things that are still so little-known about in the public eye and its a struggle. i know i at least wanna maybe help a bit to make things just a tiny bit easier and provide more information to those that need it

shrug emoticon idek

this is all i can really muster i dont have much strength to go much further and im sorry for that ahah