A rock and a hard spot...

Right now, I am seriously contemplating shuttering Drako's Website Services and The TNSC Community...

We have 5 Team Members, none of which have been much help since they signed on with the service, leaving me alone with the work load.

Topple that off with the pain I've been enduring for sometime, and I just no longer feel the desire to continue moving forward with DWS - much less with my own life.

I feel the need to focus on my own personal issues, so that I may attempt to better right myself.

The person I love...
Just ....

I don't even know how to express it.

But he was the only person I truly gave my heart to, and now I know he's also the last person who can have it.

But I still have my moments of misery, just like now..
Moments where I want to go to sleep, and never wake up again...

I need to focus on becoming better, and I feel I am currently incapable of doing that while still being an active DWS Team Member.

I need someone to take over the helm...
So that I do not become a burden to my site's userbase.

So that I do not become a liability...

Failure to do that, given my current state of mind, could mean the end of almost 15 years of my dedication and work.

I just wish today that I wasn't such a major fuck up I was 2-3 years ago...
A major fuck up in my personal life...
With the person I love...

I wish I could be forgiven and loved again...

You know who you are...
I'm sorry..
I love you...