I'm going to make a change in my life soon. It's gonna be incredibly drastic and I'm totally freaking out about it. I came out to a close friend recently. One big step in a path full of difficult conversations. One in particular is worrying me immensely. I can't sleep. A few co-workers have been supportive. It's great but if it's helping I wish the effects were more tangible. I feel better while I'm at work but as my nightly walk home comes to a close the courage vaporizes and is quickly scattered to winds of guilt and self-doubt. Knowing that I'm going to break someone's heart and my own in the process is completely, utterly and thoroughly depressing. It's taken me quite a long time to get to this point but everything is moving too fast now.