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A post about moral support by OddOly

Huh, just noticed someone unfollowed me because I'm pretty sure I hit 100 followers a week or so ago (I normally don't notice unless it's some big number).

I'm not really bothered by this, more curious because I get why someone would unfollow my tumblr where I post my thoughts and reblog fandom stuff and such (not the tumblr linked in my profile though, that's the art-only tumblr) and I'm more than okay with people being uncomfortable with my opinions but what about my art can make people that uncomfortable? I mean I do draw problematic stuff from time to time but not recently, not as far as I can remember...

Whatever, really. I'm finding that the best way to get some sleep at night is to care less about what other people think.

A few ago back when I was only starting to plan out Cop Story (and I think it had a different name back then) I was a self-conscious little mess and I was really worried what people would think. Until I drew a picture of a guy in a wheelchair and someone who I thought was a decent person told me that I "shouldn't draw freaks". It was a good wake up call because I realised I couldn't give any shit about opinions of people who'd judge me for that.

It took some more time of finding supportive friends and losing the same friends for that idea to really settle. Sometimes people tell you you're a good writer one day and tell you you suck the next day. Find something you like doing to the point you don't need any reassurance and you'll be more or less fine.

This said, I am amazed by support and kind words I do get. I am grateful for it. I just don't depend on it anymore.

A post about moral support

OddOly

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Comments

  • Link

    I wouldn't pay much mind to unfollows on an art gallery website with social elements. People are weird and have the most bizarre reasons. I had two or three silently unfollow me on a recent "personal" journal, but I know I have many, many more who follow me FOR said journals. I only give a shit about the people who choose to stick around, at any rate, or at least come and check on my work/journals. You've got the right general attitude.

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      Yeah, exactly - it's much more rewarding to appreciate people who choose to stick around than trying to appeal to everybody. I'm just curious about why because sometimes I post something thinking "oh well, this can upset certain people" and nothing happens (not that it's my aim, I've just been around people long enough to know some stuff most people don't like) and then I don't expect any reaction and people unfollow me for some reason. I guess I don't know people that well after all. XD

      I need to catch up on your posts - last week was pretty tiring and I'm still trying to get a backlog of things done.

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        There's no point in even trying to understand people's motives... just sit back and laugh at what they do, it's the least stressful option. Also no worries, there's never any rush to my journals except when I'm trying to grab some art (the last journal I just ended up drawing it myself, lmao).

        Oh man, though. I was going to leave you a shout yesterday but thought better of it, but still. I was chilling at the coffee shop and not 3 minutes after I sat down in a comfy chair, someone like.. straight out of Cop Story got wheeled over to the table next to me, and could only seem to communicate in grunts. I then spent the next ten minutes seeing if any of your characters matched up, almost shamefully. xD

        • Link

          Good point! :]

          And aww! Sometimes I almost worry my characters will accidentally match too close and someone will demand an explanation and it will be awkward - I do watch people a lot (or at least as much as I can get away with without causing discomfort, let's just say I had times when I've been stared at too so I know how it feels), to the point of trying to memorize faces of strangers in the street and saving random photos online when I find some feature visually interesting. And considering how many characters I have sooner or later a match will happen. XD

          ...this said, did any of my characters match up? :D

          • Link

            I thiiiink Houston came the closest. Wasn't an exact match, but fairly close. I was trying to not be rude and just mind my own business, but hey... plenty of open tables and you chose the one right. next. to me. So, your fault. :v

            • Link

              This makes me want to draw Houston in a coffee shop. :] Though giving him coffee might not be a good idea - he's hyperactive as it is.

  • Link

    It's unhealthy to just assume they unfollowed because they no longer like you/your art/you opinions, there are a million reasons why someone might unfollow you: interests have changed; left tumblr so they deleted their acount; maybe they even did it by accident. They may have unfollowed because their interests changed, it's not something they deliberately do to hurt you or because they don't like you, to assume the worst in people will do more damage to yourself than them. Forget the 1 person and focus on the 99 that still follow you (and all the other people who have yet to follow you!) you deserve to focus on the positives <3

    • Link

      I get your point! :] And I'm not upset or anything, especially when it comes to tumblr! But when it comes to weasyl (which is a very recent account so there isn't even any stuff I don't draw anymore, like fanart) I can't imagine any other reason besides disliking my art or my opinions. I don't think it was done to hurt me or anything but for me it's much easier to just delete something from my inbox than to go to some person's page and unfollow them so I'm curious what they disliked that much. But you're right, I shouldn't focus on that.

      How's your arm, btw? I saw your leftie drawings, that's badass, I dunno if I could draw like that with my left hand! I used to be left-handed in very early childhood so I do some things with my left hand, but drawing - noooo...

  • Link

    Shouldn't draw freaks? As in, people who are different, or animal-people? Not sure if I understand.

    I'm glad you're not sweating the departure of people like that. Sure beats having them hang around and demand that you change your style.

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      You won't fucking believe it - she meant disabled people. Some people, huh... :/ But yeah, you're right, people starting to demand stuff are worse than people who silently leave!

  • Link

    Ahh, yes. That's good that you came to that epiphany. To become bitter and push away everyone in an attempt to protect yourself is harmful to you, but this is healthy if you ask me. To be grateful will help keep you happy and motivated and attract the right kind of people that will help you on your way. Let people leave you, let them find that for whatever reason you, or your work, are not for them. Though you may encounter negative attention the worst kind is the kind that sticks around. This all works out for you.

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      I think it's a kind of balance? Don't push people away but also don't go out of your way to be likeable for everyone - you can't please everyone anyway. I'm in no way a very balanced person but I think I'm going in the right direction compared to previous years. Learned a few lessons the hard way too...

      • Link

        Balance is key, yes. But, I think everyone finds their own balance.