For the holidays my Grandparents from Missouri are coming to our house for a little- to visit etc. I am both happy and nervous about this. I haven't seen them in years, only talked to them on the phone- so obviously this is why I'm happy (that and I love them, doyeh).

I'm nervous however well, because they come from my biological father's side of the family. I don't know how many here know, but my parents are divorced and both remarried. I live with my mom and step dad. However. whenever you hear me say "dad" or "my dad", I am referring to my stepdad. He practically raised me and as I see it, he is my father. Sometimes I even forget that we aren't blood related (doesn't help also that I LOOK like I would be his daughter). My biological father on the other hand? Without getting into much history or stories, he's an asshole. Just a terrible human being. I've disowned him mentally and I refuse to make contact with him. I don't ever want him back in my life, period.

However, most of his side of the family doesn't agree with my choice. His side of the family is EXTREMELY small. It's him, his brother, and two sisters. Only his brother had kids- two girls. And I won't bother including his step kids and my half siblings. And then there is Grandma and Grandpa (Grandpa is the blood relative. His former wife, my blood related Grandma, passed away. His wife, my Grandma, has been in the family since I was little). Basically my uncle and cousins usually try to convince me to try and reconnect with him. No, just fucking no. My Grandfather tried doing this in the beginning as well.

Thus my concern. I'm worried that the subject will be brought up and it will just make things awkward. I'm not so worried about Grandma- as she understands and honestly dislikes my father anyway. Grandpa.... might. Last I heard he was pretty mad at my biological father for something, I forget. Probably about his whore of a wife or his drinking or something.

I'm also a little nervous because I don't want them to ignore or treat my dad (step dad) lowly. Again, Grandma won't, Grandpa may. But on the other hand.... THEY were the ones to ask whether or not they could stop by. So they WANT to be here. And they wouldn't want to to just.... shove their weight around. I'm pretty sure things will be ok but I can't help but worry. I just want things to go well.

And then a dreadful, yet unlikely thought: they bring my father to the house. However I can only see him being greeted with a knife from my mother, if I don't get to one first. Or my dad doesn't break his face open *sigh*.

I'm sure everything will be ok. I really really hope so at least.