so i just got out of the shower and i realized that some of the stuff i do in my head when i'm alone and undistracted by anything (like when i'm showering) is somewhat narcissistic. mind you, this stuff is mostly unintentional. like, as i was showering, in my head, i had completed and released Ad Noctvm into the world and it became popular, so i was imagining i was being interviewed by a popular gaming publication. i do stuff like this in my head a lot. and, although much less narcissistic, i also tend to give these academic lectures to some faceless person in my head about subjects i'm decently knowledgeable on. sometimes i also have these OCD-ish imaginings about something really bad happening, which make me depressed.
i don't know how to end this. that was just an observation on stuff i do in my head. how about you guys? what kind of stuff do you do in your head?
I used to do that, but now whenever I think of finishing something I mentally imagine myself not becoming famous, but the centrefold in a niche market, or a literal 'corner'. A Cult Classic not a best seller. Ever since realizing my art can appeal to a wide demographic of people I've also learnt it can appeal to a demographic of people I would /never/ get along with. I sometime mentally compare myself as in equal standing to my favourite writers and artists, like Alan Moore and Grant Morrison. The lectures and mental essays are somewhat familiar but I feel more like I'm talking to a group that's constantly contributing and growing.
For a narcissist, I'm pretty leaning towards wanting to belong to a counterculture rag of misfits and improper parts.
-Music is often in my head.
-The places I've been, and trying to remember the people I've seen or walked passed. There's this guy who talks to himself waiting for the bus, so he's been on my mind.
-I've been having this thing for cool looking armour lately. There should be armour made entirely out of fungi and mushrooms.
-Recent fantasies about white lions and delicious hard-boiled eggs.
I do that, but its with other things I want to be successful about.
I also fap to myself in the mirror. Are you /that/ narcissistic? Double narcissist points.
I talk to meta characters like Sidney in my head. Sometimes I'll talk out loud but he's an inspirational voice. Sidney is unique among my characters. Pretty sure he's the Self I'll eventually turn into when I become self-actualized.
I also talk/interact with/fuck other characters, like Starscream. Triple narcissist points muahaha. TF Prime Starscream is like, all my narcissism and assholery and ignorance and everything awful but still somehow lovely, combined with the mindful, studious, empathetic, psychologist counterpart, Powersync. It's like my whole soul, in one veneer formed from a fandom setting, as this grand internal thought experiment mindwank and its wonderful. Triple narcissist points for being in love with a character that projects/reflects part of my Shadow, especially of what a stupid shit I was in the past.
I fucking love healthy narcissism. It's not really narcissism. It's more like just loving yourself as you should and seeing your whole self ugly parts and all and being like -- Existence is wonderful, I love my own everything.
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nightmarethestallion
I do that sort of stuff all the time, man. There's nothing wrong with it; it feels good to flex the 'ol ego! I think doing that sort of stuff reflects confidence, and an aspiration to be something.