Just wanted to take the time out and toss some well wishes for the holidays. I truly hope everyone manages to have a great day, but moreso, a meaningful one.

Is this one of those 'you should be thankful' journals?

Of course! :)

Is it long as can be?

Of courrrrrrrse! :D

^{I rarely say stuff that's on my mind like this, but guess it's ok to kinda squeeze it out for the holiday, just to get it out of my system}

It's something I wish people did regularly. I keep the things I'm thankful for on my mind every day, because I acknowledge that everything I have in life right now may have never come to be; the people I've grown closer to and share my daily life with; home and work situations, and everything it encompasses. True that today may be the day to openly celebrate it, but it's still things that never leave my mind. I feel I'm heading in the right direction in life, and feel I'm heading there with the right people by my side. This is something I believe a lot of people, near and far, are still in search for, and something I absolutely treasure having in life: Direction.

It's genuinely concerning when others tend to have the mentality of "wow, so-and-so is lucky to have such". If only life was so black and white, right? We each receive something truly unique about ourselves, but it's how we use it that counts. I've seen the best things happen to the worst people, and the worst things happen to some of the best, as I'm sure many of you have. I've seen people who have the biggest homes, the most supportive families, and true, undeniable security in their life to fall back on, yet squander it away and spend their time buried in complaints, in longing for more, in seemingly true unhappiness in such. Yet right next to them, I see people with life altering injuries, especially this past weekend, still heading towards the life they seek amidst what holds them back. Not to call anyone out, but this weekend alone, I saw people with diseases sit down, talk, laugh, and have the time of their lives. I saw people pronounced knee injuries get up and actually dance with others, yet all the while, and in some cases, literally feet away, hearing another complaining about his dance routine results as if the experience and opportunity was no longer a factor in the fun to be had, but instead, results. I saw people who missed out on a thing or two in life that they wanted, and because of such, can barely function in society anymore. People surrounded by ones he calls friends on all sides, yet sits and stares, longing for something different, doing nothing more than voicing complaints while those around him continue trying to cherish the short time they had together. Of course, there's a fine line between something genuinely bad happening to someone and authentic pessimism, but it always seems that only the spoiled cannot tell the difference between the two.

For myself, over the weekend and past few months, several of my friends planned a surprise for me. A lot of time, effort, and money, was donated solely on my behalf to help me acquire something I've wanted. In many ways, I still don't know how to properly show how thankful I am for such. Obviously not the gift directly, that's great, but the act of such it what I can't stop thinking about. That in the life that I lead, that I've grown to be with people who would go out of their way to pitch in and do such, just for me. I didn't need anything in the first place, and I don't know why I even got nominated to be the receiver of something so special, be it big or small. It's flooring to me, and honestly, it's something I'm really not used to and don't know how to handle all too well. A handshake or a hug doesn't cut it, and typing "thank you smileyface.jpg" just doesn't convey how I feel. It's one of those things that just sits in my mind and reminds me that wow, of all the things that life has thrown at me, look at the people I have now. Look who I sit with, chat to, laugh with, and learn more about, every single day of my life, and even want to do the same with me. I don't know how to say how much it meant to me, at all, just thank every one of you who put forth such a thought on my behalf.

Everything, good or bad, leads us and shapes us into the people we continue becoming. I wasn't fortunate enough to have a family or a safe haven to fall back on if the going got rough. Never had a chance at college, and missed out on quite a bit just to stay afloat. Up until the past few years, everything has been nothing but a struggle. But through it all, as hectic as it's been, I've never been more thankful now than for the people I can share my life with, and I wouldn't change a single thing about it. I'm thankful for all the experiences I've had, both good and bad, because they've both lead me to where I am today. I'll never know how a life like mine ended up being so blessed.

Thank you all, for everything you've ever done. :)