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A year for myself by Sunshinegecko31718

Prior to November 2013 I was very creative
I won a character contest and my character is in a novllea (THE BLISS by Jennifer Murgai) I read a lot too one of my best memories is waking up and reaching for the book I was invested in at the time (also trying to read it by street lamp in the car)

I was into photography and doll collecting I was part of forums and kept up with stories (I loved pullip fiction) some of my favorite users and authors were Aijo (who still posts on Flickr to my surprise) and kakeid

I lived in books and anime, I read angsty fan fiction sometimes and even wrote some myself
I drew fan art here and there but really drew my OCs from 2005-2013 200 pages of art, OCs, ideas

I changed from November 2013 - 2023
I changed for the worse.
I became a copy machine, a detective, a policer, a stalker, Harasser, troll, controller,
What’s worse is I went from 100 pages of art in a year to maybe 6 pages a month
Or not at all

I went from drawing because I had an idea or character I loved to drawing to impressing the wrong people to try and be in an “it crowed”
Instead of changing for me I changed for people who despised me
I turned my straight OC gay and girly for a pedo
I stopped loving a character and ship from my childhood for a hater I changed what I shipped and why for that same person
I tried helping screaming crying perfect storm young adults They weren’t looking for a mentor

So I’ve sat here for days deciding my next move and while drastic I feel it’s the only way to reclaim myself

I will be taking the year off of social media and art sites

EXCEPTIONS;

Facebook and messenger for my husband, pen pals and parents

Twitter for ‪DeadlyFatale/ Alex as I have art planned for her and we just rekindled a friendship I don’t want her to think I just dropped her

Instagram for my friend Dannie who doesn’t use much else

BUT, it’s for messaging and communication only, I will only post artwork if it’s for someone (Alex for example) I won’t be publicly posting Art, photos, gushing about stuff, blogging etc
I want to old school myself, print photos, keep to myself sharing only though messenger or mail,

My biggest rules for myself is this

NO screencap art
NO draw the squad art
REFERENCE ONLY REAL PHOTOS
Maybe art style challenges
Fan art only what really speaks to me
Original art (lots of it)

Consider this a sabbatical and a temporary Goodbye
To friends who really want to keep in touch message me if we’re on Facebook I’ll work something out

For everyone else strangers, haters, and acquaintances alike I will see you in 2025
(Well not for the haters obviously)

A year for myself

Sunshinegecko31718

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    Best of luck on your life revamp! I hope you make it to somewhere you want to be! :)