Highly recommend you read the Full Journal Here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7831099/

JJ
...So, I've really tried to think of a tactful way of asking this without sounding whiney or desperate (digging my grave in the process), but I just can't, so I'll be blunt: Will you help me learn how to talk to people (like you) online? I'm not this awkward offline (at least I really HOPE not), but I can't use my offline conversational skills when I'm not face to face. You seem to be really good at talking to people, if your amount of friends and people who you include, and include you, in stories and artwork, what was I doing wrong that I need to do better so it's less awkward for you and others?

...in stories and artwork *is any indication, what was I doing wrong...

ME
Uh...Just be normal? Really when you're trying to converse with someone you are interested in you first need to understand to yourself why you are interested in that person. What do you want? There has to be a motive or reason you are reaching out to a person. So answer that question, to yourself. You don't have to share that answer with anyone, in fact Id advise against it because that would make you seem pushy and desperate or eager and that can make people uncomfortable; they will either have no interest and ignore you, or be mean back as a defensive measure. So, what do you want? Why are you talking to this person?

Most times sadly, people want art and free stuff, or someone to dump their life's problems on and get pity or attention. This isn't the case with all people, but it happens unfortunately too often these days and it is stressful and challenging to figure out who is genuine and who is an attention whore. In that same regard though, just because you make friends with people does not mean and/or allow you to be dramatically sad and depressing all the time with your friends in hopes they will cheer you up, and might rp with you or draw you something or whatever. It is exhausting to take someone else's sorrows and troubles onto your shoulders when most likely the person getting all this bad news is also having struggles of their own.

This is not always the case - It is normal and completely valid to come to your friends when you're feeling down for support and encouragement if you cant find it anywhere else. No one likes "whiney" its a serious turn-off simply as a social interaction. Especially in the reality of social sites like this, where the chances are high that you may not even know the real life person you are talking too.

We all come to sites like these to have fun and post art and stories and interact with people who share our interests: that is how you can meet and talk to people, by being genuine in your comments on art you like of a character or journal post or any kind of posting that merits feedback or can start conversation. If you want to establish any kind of connection, you have to work on it, pursue it, seek it. Chances are you will meet people who will reply back and be interested in conversation of whatever is being discussed. Other times you may get a one time reply and that's all, its at your discretion whether you decide to pursue conversation and see where it goes.

And there will be times where you might really want to chat or get to know someone and that person is just not interested back, (now obviously it is there job to tell you that kindly and politely, not rude and be an asshole about it) and it might suck and hurt your feelings, but you must respect that persons space and desire to cease contact. If you violate this, a person is likely to report you for stalking or just block you. If the person treats you like crap, then good riddance anyways. Just don't cause drama or fights, they are pointless and only lead to stress, headaches and trouble. Not worth anyone's time.

I have been in all of these positions at one time or another in my time on these websites and in the community. When I first started out I was innocent and didn't know better, I would comment on stuff and it would come off creepy and awkward or random to the person receiving my comment, which would then weird them out and push them away. What was fun and playful to me was freaking annoying and creepy to someone else. I had to learn how to socialize respectfully, and it took patience from people willing to give me a chance where I would learn, and also people who called me out and were blunt that would jolt me into the reality of my behavior.

I've been the sad depressive lump that shouldn't pour my sob stories on people and friends, and I did anyway. Its hypocritical. What I realize is, that everyone has a bad day, and everyone is allowed to express themselves how that want to, freedom of expression and all that. It's just that we drag others down, it isn't fair to them and it isn't socially acceptable. That's why "vent art" and vent or rant journals are a thing, people leave warning on the titles of post that by clicking on this you are agreeing to be exposed to someone's sadness or anger; feelings (usually negative) other than happiness and joy.

So its really trial and error. You will make mistakes, and you will learn from them, I hope. Its a journey, and everyone is still on it. I am so glad I've met people who choose to have me in their lives. I am wanted and loved and admired. Even when I have moments and days where my mind tries to tell me otherwise, or how my real life is not like my online one, I really have to battle: literally mind over matter - that no matter what, at the end of the day, I am alive, I have my basic needs, and I have friends. I may not be popular, super talented, or swimming in money, but I have achieved a lot of new skills and improved ones I already had over the course of my near 7 years here. I have a long way to go, and there will always be people who learn faster and do better than you in everything. There is always someone bigger and better. Know your place, and strive and work to get bigger and better if that's something you want to do.

It also never hurts to have a sense of humor.

So self-evaluate, test the waters, jump in, go with the flow, interact and learn. Big tip, people love getting comments, favorites are cool, but getting a comment, something to read that someone else has to say about something you posted is a small little excitement that artists and creators and people in general crave. We want to be heard and seen and appreciated. We want to get our ideas out and entertain. So make that effort, people appreciate it, and you may also make more connections and meet people.

Another good way to meet people is by joining public streams and watching artists draw and create their work, usually there are chat boxes where watchers can chat live and interact with many people at once, introducing themselves and talking generally about anything while focusing on the art being drawn or the game being streamed. It generates conversations and interactions. You wont get along with everyone; that's a given, and that's normal. Just be yourself and the people who are interested will come.