Meet Dipstick (and his amazing hat). He's a stupid little axolotl guy (or gal? who knows? he's an amphibian, does it matter?) with a very special perfectly normal top hat.

--Yes, the hat has a name; in horrible eldritch tongues, of course. It also speaks the language of the elder gods in fine, papery whispers.

--The interior of the hat is just a dark pit, void of light. It appears to be a portal into some far dimension; Dipstick, being the moron he is, uses it as a sort of bag of holding. Pockets are hard for salamanders.

--The hat can size-shift; it will always be the perfect fit for whomever it decides to be worn by.

--Yes, axolotls come in colours other than albino/leuctistic! And they can, rarely, metamorphose! This tends to greatly shorten their lifespan, but Dipstick is special. Actually probably the hat is extending his lifespan by centuries. Oops.

Maybe the hat will get its own ref sheet. For now, here's this!

Thanks to Amagire for assistance with the concept.