I am a terrible cook. I can, and probably will burn anything in the process (often including parts of the house). I could probably burn something trying to boil water. That doesn't stop me from trying, though.

Once in a blue moon, I'll try to cook a meal for someone. I'll slave over the oven, pouring hours of hard work and love into a meal. More often than not, people find various excuses not to eat it. Or, if they're extremely kind, they'll eat a bit before the food mysteriously disappears.

I'm proud to say, however, that I have not (yet) killed someone with my cooking. And it doesn't taste THAT bad to me. Or my dog. Then again, my dog happily eats various things that I'm sure can't be that appetizing.

And yes, that's a flamethrower in the picture. I like using flamethrowers to preserve the subtle "grilled" propane-like taste in my cooking. My second favourite tool is the microwave. I mean, how often do you get to bombard stuff with dangerous radiation?