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Emezi the Swamp Frog by JonKin (critique requested)

Emezi the Swamp Frog (critique requested)

JonKin

Within the Bangweulu swamp, there once was a master wizard named Oman that was considered the best wizard in all of Africa. Years of fighting demons, warlocks, and monsters took their toll on his body. He knew that his time on Earth was coming to a close, and he wanted to pass on his legacy to someone else.

Emezi was a young thief that was that was well-known within the Bangweulu swamp. She was a 3rd generation thief that felt that she did thievery more because it was her lot in life. Emezi felt that she was created for more in her life and wanted to be more, but didn't know how to go about doing it.

One fateful day, Oman was fighting off a horde of demon-goblins that was razing a village. Emezi just happened to be in the area hiding on a rooftop while casing a couple of huts to rob later that day. Oman was holding his own against the horde, but one of the Demon-goblins slipped though his offense and delivered a mortal blow to the old wizard. Oman fell to the ground, his lungs labored to draw breath into his body. The horde moved away from the dying wizard, confident that their enemy's death with be a guarantee. As the wizard was gasping for his last breath, Emezi jumped from her hiding spot next to Oman. As the frog thief started to search his robes for coins and things to sell, he looked up with glassy and chanted a few words. As a confused Emezi looked on, Oman grabbed her arm, then his body exploded into dust that surrounded Emezi. She coughed and when she opened her eyes, Oman's body was gone. Emezi then heard a voice in her head; "Young one, are you ready to see what is beyond your eyes?

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Visual / Digital