Seems like the only art I can make is crap for myself right now. I guess my brain really needs to vomit out some of the feelings rolling around inside my head and heart. Tried to draw something else and it wasn't working, and then this just happened. Maybe this is me slowly climbing out of this art funk… at least I drew a full body this time, even if it is flawed with plenty of anatomical errors. I honestly wasn't focused on that. I just wanted to get the feelings in my head out onto the paper. It helps me handle the feelings a little better, and sometimes gets them completely out of my head, or at least makes them more manageable.

Seems I draw SW in poses like this a lot when I'm feeling down. Ripped up wings because I've been feeling beaten down lately. Scars and cuts everywhere because they are everywhere on me, and many are fresh. And new ones are hard to fight off. This piece represents a battle with temptation - the temptation to harm myself, to drink or drug, and to give up.

But now that it's out I feel a little stronger. I hope it sticks. Just been feeling real down lately. Down or angry, it's either one or the other and it sucks. Especially when it's both.

Anyway blah blah blah SW being angsty beat up and hurting herself smoking and drinking with messed up wings obviously listening to Tool's "Sober"

"Why can't we not be sober?
I just want to start this over.
Why can't we drink forever.
I just want to start things over.

I am just a worthless liar.
I am just an imbecile.
I will only complicate you.
Trust in me and fall as well.
I will find a center in you.
I will chew it up and leave,
I will work to elevate you
just enough to bring you down.

Trust me."

SW + Art © JGF 2014
Lyrics © Tool