The City Afloat by EdwardSebastian (critique requested)

The City Afloat

The City Afloat (critique requested)

EdwardSebastian

20 January 2014 at 03:27:45 MST

Oh hey, look! Heavy music!

This is a song I wrote a while back(meaning 2+ years ago) based off a picture a friend over on FA did. The very same picture that's in the thumbnail of this song, funny enough. I decided to re-record it recently in a different tuning and here's what happened.

Seriously though, dunno how I feel about that mix. Let me know if there's anything you think I should look at fixing.

Lyrics:
It came at night
Steeped in the darkness
Harboring no light
Hanging in the silence
The air begins to change
Everything pure is tainted
Sweet smells sour
Smells like poison

As the city floats, citizens stare in wonder
Never noticing they have become the prey
To a pestilence that will sour their hearts
Even as they move to their temple and pray

No
Do not approach this place
You won't make it out alive
You're too weak
The bright light
Destroys all of your will
Leaving you in Hell

Worry spreads far and fear spreads wide
Nobody here is sleeping at night
This city afloat sitting in silence
It's mere presence inciting this violence
Decision was made and it must me torn down
We have to shoot it right out of the sky
But how can you fight what you don't understand
Even if you use all of your might

"I say kill it"
"I say leave it"
A call to arms
We move tonight

There was no war
No fight
It was a massacre
I watched in fear as my brothers
Turned on one another
I was there to witness human genocide
Caused by our own hands
My only solution was to look to the sky
At that which we don't understand

You blocked the sun
You filled the sky
You are the reason
Earth's empty tonight
There in the sky
You look down at grey soil
Oblivious
To all the turmoil

You offer no words
Offer no explanation
We are to blame
For our own extinction
I look to the sky
At the city afloat
Imagine heaven
Imagine hope
Could I too soon escape
This world of pain
Could eternal life
Too soon begin
I lay with my brothers
Lay down my head
And we'll do the dance
The dance of the dead

Submission Information

Views:
280
Comments:
3
Favorites:
1
Rating:
General
Category:
Multimedia / Original Music

Comments

  • Link

    Sweet work Ed, I really like the lyrics as well but then I like gloomy things

  • Link

    I love that you can post music on here. Nice image.

    • Link

      Oh I do too! And it's got a MUCH easier layout for it.