Lona and I were kicked out of grandma's house yesterday after a 3 day ordeal with grandma who proved to be incompetent and self destructive. And made life there so miserable for Lona that she had another stress stroke night before last. So yesterday input my foot down. I informed the old woman that I would not allow her to hurt me and my wife, to threaten our cat, or to try and tell me that when I scrub a kitchen on my hands and knees for four hours, it isn't clean enough for her. There was a lot more, but basically we let her win. We moved back to Lona's mom's house yesterday. I packed up all our stuff at the other house all in one trip, and today I'm paying for it by feeling I've physically and emotionally been put through a meat grinder. I have a month to find a new job. Anything I can find won't pay as badly (or as well, ironically), as I was only getting $5 an hour, but since I was 24/7/365 it came to $4000 a month which covered all our monthly bills and had been allowing us to slowly pay down our credit cards. Now all we have is the money we were paid for last month, and that has to last until I can find a new job. With Lona back in the six month stroke recovery period, she can't even look for a job until next March or so, for health reasons.

I have to support us - the weight is on my head. If you're feeling anything from me, I apologize. What you're feeling is my anger, my betrayal at the way this woman who supposedly loved us has treated us when we put our lives on hold to make sure she'd be able to stay in her own home for her end-of-life, my sadness at having to cut her out of my life also meaning that I lose Grandpa, and my despair over upcoming bills with no way to pay them...right at the holiday season.

I'm trapped. I'm furious. I'm sad. I'm worried. And as I've dropped off the internet map these last three months I doubt an appeal for donations would go anywhere at all.

I keep reminding myself that there are lots of positives to this as well, but right now I admit I'm having trouble seeing them. Just wanted to let you all know what's going on. I have to go back over there and pick up a few things I forgot. But after that, I'm never going to see them again...not until their funerals. And, honestly, I'm not sure I'd go to hers.

Sorry for the long, rambling post.