srry to bother u guys but I just feel I must vent out in some way, so only read this is u wish and give a damn. I feel crappy, like shit, lower than that, like I don't even seem to matter, that even though I have those that can see the good in me and allow me the honor to be their friend, I still feel alone and hated, like some of those I care about have turned their back on me and been led to believe i'm something i'm not. so I have been streaming more and more to try to improve my skills and to distract myself from these feelings, but does not seem to work, but it seems to be all I can do, that it is one of the few things I seem to be good for, so I may stream later today I guess, I just want the pain to go away, for things to go back to normal, how they were before the bad rep, before I lost the trust of several people I care about, I just want to be normal :(