There was a huge storm at my house not too long ago. I was absolutely terrified as my parents suggested I move into the basement. Thankfully it wasn't a tornado, but now I know there is the possibility of them around here. I've been terrified of a tornado hitting my house ever since I was a child. Just the thought of me losing all my possessions in one of those damn things is gut wrenching.

I'm so sick of being afraid of everything. My parents dying, the country being invaded, and this. I'm so sick of it. My room is on the second floor, so it would get ripped apart in a storm like that. I look up at the sky and shout F bombs at it, I hate mother nature and her menstrual cycles like this. Just just want to tear out her entrails.

I'm so sick of living. All these fears, they stop me from sleeping, they stop me from having a good day, they try to stop my will to live. I can't go through a single day without thinking of some form of suicide. When I was down in the basement, I was actually lightly considering taking my father's shotgun to my head.

But I can't commit suicide, it's a sin. But is there really a heaven? I mean no disrespect to god, but is there a place where we go when we die? Or are our souls trapped in our bodies, even as they are cremated? I'm so sick of this.

Beside all my psychological breakdown, Yosh-E-O still needs help, visit his page to help him, please.

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6821008/