From the Box of the Kittybird:
So, some of you may be aware I have been known to have -mostly- (yes I have had a couple of major, but Im lucky to say I've had wonderful people who have helped me) minor panic attacks, and I would like to address some issues that arise with that, if you haven't had one or known someone who has had situations like this, then you are very lucky.

They are A LOT more common than people realize.

There are a few reasons for this, one simple reason is people around the person in question, may not know the signs of their friends' reactions or just think they are messing around OR like my case, the person in question realizes they are about to/are experience an attack and try to control or remove themselves from the situation.

Now I can only speak from personal experience, but I can extrapolate on things I have been told by other people.
Now panic attacks can be caused by so many things, but in my case I do have certain triggers, now when I say trigger I dont mean it will happen in EVERY situation that has these triggers, but they are more conditional, emotional, health situations as well.

A good example is one that happened at a convention a couple of years ago. Now I LOVE going to cons, meeting new people and hanging out, I can be very social when the mood hits me but this wasn't one of those times. Now Draggy wasn't with me and at that point I couldn't see anyone I knew, whether or not they were there that's a different matter. I was waiting in the main con area for an evening concert, by a certain well known artist. I was REAALLY excited to get to see him in concert. The problem was so was everyone else at the con....So LOTS of people were gathering, and I started to feel a little crowded and anxious.

This did start a little tremor as I call it (this is a way I describe it), but no big deal, breath deep and slow, find someone I know or move to an area that isn't so crowded. Because there were so many people the second option was a little harder; more people, less room. Another Tremor, and it started to feel like the situation was slowly slipping out of my grip. This is where the landslide section of the attack comes..I HAD to get out, even though I know that I was around people who would understand, my fight or flight instinct started to kick in. I fled, and much to my shame when someone tried to talk to me (one of my friends) I snapped at him and rushed back to my room, and perceived safety, where Draggy was, who saw my state and talked me down as she is used to doing (I have no idea what I would do with out her) I did apologize to my friend the next day.
I stayed in the room for the rest of the night and from what I heard, missed a wonderful concert.

That situation was caused by me being overwhelmed by what is going on and a perceived lack of control of the situation.

Another one happened when I lost my phone at another con (I feel bad that this seems to always happen at cons). Several of my friends were helping me look for it, and in the end we found it; it had been handed in to security. Now the attack WASN'T about the loss of the phone as such, but the fact if I lost my phone I couldn't talk to Draggy, (even though she was in in our hotel room) and I had made arrangements for a friend to call me to sort out plans for the next day.
Now the rational part of my brain was saying "Its just a phone, Draggy is up in our room, you can talk to her when you need, your friend will find you, if not figure out you couldn't come to the phone. Your phone is most likely in lost property." This is also the jist of what one of my friends who was with me was telling me. And what I would say to someone else in the situation. But the irrational part was freaking out, (Which was over-ruling everything) there were tears and I was having trouble controlling my breathing, but the phone was found and the situation resolved.

Those were two of the more extreme attacks I have had. Mostly, if I start noticing my, "tremors" I try to excuse myself from a situation and/or take slow calming breaths and close my eyes, allowing myself to relax or at least remind myself that I am in a safe place with friends and people who do understand. Sometimes I notice and can do it, and if not my friends know the signals and help with the situation.

This brings me to another talking point. Friends.
I am blessed with people who know what its like to deal with my situation, and have learnt when they need to step in, check on me, or even intervene.

What to do if someone is having a panic attack:

DO
Talk calmly to them, reassurance is a huge help.

Ask them what the issue is, offer constructive solutions, sometimes this will help you connect with what is causing the attack.

Ask them to look at you, and encourage them to breath with you. Take deep slow breaths, with them, don't be surprised if they dont want to, respect this but be encouraging.

Ask if they have any medication/remedy they take to help them. When I know there maybe places or times that I'm more likely to have an episode, I carry a bottle of a herbal remedy that seems to help me (Yes. It is legal) Some people do have medication.

Ask if there's anyone they can get for them, sometimes a significant other (Such as Draggy) can be a powerfully reassuring sight for them, and often that person knows what is most effective in calming the panick-ee down. But don't fetch them unless they want the person.

Try and give them space and quiet. Over-stimuation and people staring/asking what is wrong can be just as bad as anything else.

BE REASSURING AND UNDERSTANDING

DO NOT
TELL THEM TO SNAP OUT OF IT, CALM DOWN, RELAX, CHILL OUT OR TELL THEM THEY ARE BEING A DRAMA QUEEN OR HYSTERICAL. They know what is happening. I highlighted this one because this is a key one for me. On occasion that this has happened to me it doesn't help. I am trying to calm myself down and control myself. I don't WANT to be an adult standing somewhere crying and freaking out and I am doing my best to not be so, and telling me to do what Im trying DOESN'T HELP. Want to know what its like? Remember that scene in Airplane? They queue of people slapping the woman, telling her to calm down? Yeah. That.

DO NOT
Try to restrain them, or touch them if they don't ask for it. You are dealing with a primitive urge, and their body is gearing up to fight or run. Luckily I tend to run, but I have known others who resist. IF they ask for a hug or something, then you have permission to do so. In most cases, they know what they need and when they need it. They will ask. THIS ONE IS FOR YOUR SAFETY AS WELL AS THEIRS. I have seen someone try to restrain/hug someone and get a elbow in their ahems in thanks.

OFFER THEM SOMEONE'S MEDICATION/REMEDIES. If they have their own that's great, that means they know they have an issue, and can take it to help, but if you offer them someone else's a) That's not their medication so therefore could be against the law. B) Can be taken as "CALMDOWN YOU NEED HELP!" (See the earlier DO NOT) C) Could potentially cause unwanted reactions.

PLEASE NOTE:
If someone is already talking to them/calming down don't butt in or try and take over. Instead maybe try and see what else can be done, I.e get some water, try and give them privacy, maybe even try and get in contact with someone IF THEY ASK.

DO NOT
Force them to do anything. Ask if they need help, but dont be offended if you are told no.

The biggest thing I must stress:
Do not do ANYTHING that the person having the attack doesn't want.
Personally this is a issue of lack of control of self, letting them know that they are in charge of what is happening, helps ALOT.

This is a personal view.
Panic/Anxiety attacks can be caused by a whole RANGE of things. So PLEASE try and understand, it is not something we can control, we can deal with it and we have to, and we appreciate that people WANT to help, we also appreciate people who listen and give us space if we ask.

I guess what Im saying is. The best thing you can do someone in this situation is LISTEN TO THEM. Please.

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