edit 1: added picture of ~furry hole~
edit 2: I should mention that telepictionaries were sponsored by Mynxbits (provided paper) and VisMis (provided drawing implements)
edit 3: HOW COULD I FORGET thank you Mynxbits for editing and saving me some embarrassment :3
edit 4: DONT FORGET please correct me if i misremember something - I err on the side of including an event at the cost of misremembering a little! THAT SAID - edited the first line of the hyper furry puppydancer's not-rapey reply.

Greets!

If you’re here for telepictionary: https://imgur.com/a/VP5D6
If you’re here for my GasCon 2014 experience: ctrl-f for 1AM.
If you’re crazy enough to read my whole MWFF account: carry on!

DAWN OF THE FURST DAY

well it was evening on Thursday when we left actually. Lots of delays, a little scrambling, a little forgetting to bring stuff ;_; Thankfully we had a ride down in the form of Airyu's furry recruit Iris driving, instead of the usual public transit options I've used.

Three hours later, we start dragging things from the car to Red Bar so Mynx can let us in. It was here that I meet Swift's asian brother Siroc (who's not actually his brother), also Airyu hugs EVERYONE. En route to room, we run into like a million fuzzies including Izixs, Kyash, RD, and probably others I'm forgetting about. We also gather a Ricochetotter to help out with the last of the stuff on a second trip, prance around the parking lot a bit, then go back to Red Bar for nibbles and bits. I steal some spicy mayo, talk about random things that I forget about, and I guess leave. On the way up, we meet AxioWolf and Amenophis/Velkro/Cats Own You, who are Two Cool Fuzzybutts B)

We eventually somehow end up LizBliz's room where I meet Enid for the first time! I make a half-hearted organic chemistry joke, Airy comments on her Twilight Sparkle (tm) socks, and then we immediately leave and go to sleep.

DAWN OF THE SECOND DAY

In which Tai wakes up, goes downstairs to eat, and gets texts from one (1) AxelSparkster trying to meet up. Tai looks out the consuite doors.. Tai sees a very smooshable face looking back. Tai goes to investigate but doesn’t see smooshyface anywhere because Axel is hiding behind a pillar :|

In which Tai dresses like a certain sibling of ACNL's Isabelle, and helps Airyu carry artist alley stuff downstairs. We meet up with People (tm) By The Elevators (tm) as we wait for Arteest Alley to dish out table numbers.

In which Mynx teaches me the nonimportance of papercraft fold direction and makes sense and is a good fox.

In which Airy-Tai get artist alley table number 3 and set up, just before Tai wanders off and keeps Siroc company for a bit (since he's on standby and has to wait for the lucky arist alley winners to be 15 minutes late before he can get a table number). We discuss military life, art history, and how Astro is literally the devil because there's no way so many people can love astro SO MUCH. I give Siroc a ninjastar I folded earlier for good luck and go onward.

Somehow I meet up with Iris and we go up to get stuff together (including things for my nose) - on the way down, Iris contemplates the utility of a sona that's always eating beef jerky. We wander back down, and find that Siroc's gotten in thanks to my lucky ninja star, and I wander off again with Mynx only to have Mynx yip that he needs feeding.

Coming back from food, we run into RD who introduces us to Bomber and Millinius, the latter of whom is coincidentally steered toward the ~career field~ I've chosen. I give them a theorycrafted answer as to why 70% ethanol is better than 91/100% for disinfection (short answer - <70% isn't lethal, and >70% can scramble the skin of stinky bacteria so that the alcohol can't penetrate and kill the beating heart). RD mentions the start of a dinner party he's trying to plan, and I get all wet-blankety and whine that I don't want to organize anything. Ferretparade and I talk briefly about meat, I lament Mynx’s ability to cook, then we go up to organize OPERATION PROCYGIFT.

You see, Mynx has purchased a Some Assembly Required RocketGroot figurine, and being the sly fox that he is, hides it in a drawer with a dozen stickynotes eventually leading to it (For example, "Look in the Action Packer by Rubbermaid (tm)", which would've hid the note "Look in Tai's pocket" with an illustration pointing to the correct pocket to look in. At the end, there was an OH MY GOD thank you Mynx :3 ~ followed by Procy breaking out some eurogoodies and eurosnacks for future partying (that I realize I mostly never tried).

At some point we wander to Jasonroom to see Aeron, and we have our annual discussion about how to pronounce "Procyon". Cole arrives and I pick him up by his butt and carry him around. We pass around Paco's Taco Stroker (a masturbatory aid of the highest quality which essentially is a ridged silicone waffle that folds into a “taco” shape when in use), and Liz goes into the bathroom promising to grunt while putting on their binder but never delivering on that promise.

I head out at some point and run into MrWolf, who was in search of om noms. Using my official authority, I thoroughly inspect MrWolf for fuzz, telling him to turn around, turn his head and cough. Back in my room, I start icing the beer and talk with Michal and Procy and Vis while eating pork 'n' beans over a few episodes of Adventure Time and Regular Show till it was time to collect Airyu from Artist Alley, where we packed up and headed off for a round of telepictionary. I scamper around trying to drag everyone and their mother to telepictionary (which resulted in delays - sorry yall). Also, Science Fox pickpockets me here. No respect for frazzlepoofed otters running around (SF eventually gives my money back) :| At some point we send mass quacks to Astro.

After telepictionary, the host splits - I wander off and get bounced from the puppy play panel despite 4 people leaving (it was packed as heckles), so I wander more and run into Amenophis again. Eventually, I dig up Airyu and Iris and head back up to our room, after meeting spiderman with a bunny tail offering free hugs. We drink drinks from cut plastic bottles, discuss tits and mynxbits, and realized that Airyu's Alley profits matched the house numbers she's lived at (with the realization that if she makes 0 dollars next time, we'd be homeless). Everyone touches Javs who complains everything is upsettingly sexy, so me and Bliz pin him down. Airyu gets Bliz to touch Sasha's eye under protest. I take a sip of Everclear and immediately regret my life. A furpile or two happens as well. I place Paco's Taco Stroker on Javs's forehead with a growl of "SIMMMMMMMMBA," which results in the following exchange:

"Tai. TAI. what the fuck. WHAT THE FUCK""
"Yes?"
"Did you put that on your dick?"
"Yes."
"And you put it on my FACE?"
"Why do you think I was going SIMMMMMMMBA?"
"Did you really?"
"no"

Another trip to Blizroom happens here - I ruffle Procyon immediately after he opens the door, and teach Simmo where his willy is (by means of demonstrating how Paco's Taco Stroker works). Jason arrives and I deliver Paco's Taco Stroker to him as promised, and he immediately cries out "I am having an orgasm right now". Javs gets jealous. Also we discuss how I reached into the bottom of a furry hole to pull out an egg containing a cat magnet (2 pics courtesy of Procy: http://imgur.com/JtBjEuw,QcC1ZEg ).

I think today ends around hereish.

DAWN OF THE SATUR DAY

I feel like butts so I sleep in for like forever. I have a good, long talk with Science Fox about life, the universe, and allergies. Airyu finishes an abbreviated stint in Artist Alley, and we go to consuite to nibble on food. We run into Fidget who tells us about ToledoFurs.

We get in line for Too Much Light. A good show, starting with everyone making lion, tiger, and bear noises before screaming OH MY!!!. The show was filled with features like a kitten that doesn't understand criticism so it knocks over all the things, trying to guess what's in the box with an uncooperative boxholder, another play that starts off normal but ends in someone saying zerozerozerzerozero because they couldn't finish writing the play and kept the 00000000's caused by a cat sleeping on the keyboard, a re-enactment of the wolf/sheep/cabbage logic problem that ends in the farmer leaving the three of them stranded in the middle of the river. "Things I learned working from home" was a skit that lasted all of the time it took to say "I can make myself cum 3 times in 5 minutes". Another skit had to buffer. Still another was a book club that transformed into a performing dolphin troupe. One skit pulled someone out of the audience, blindfolded them, and dangled various unpleasant things around them like a pitcher of water and an egg and a knife. Another skit involved seductively chewing marshmallows, then transferring the chewed marshmallows into another person's mouth. Also, pretend poor people. The show ended on a great skit with one person flossing another's mouth, a narrator describing how the Crocodile Bird doesn't actually dig out food from crocodiles' mouths, and the original flosser walking off sadly for a bit before going back and resuming flossing again.

Then DINNER PARTY. Lots of paws, lots of ~'s. Rob shatters my world by saying I can’t call him Collie anymore. A burrito malfunction occurs so Rob hangs out with us for awhile. Everything was well-executed despite my grumping about - many thanks, the Relaxingest of Dragons :3

Back in our room, the party gets STARTED. Rob and Soto (the cause of burrito malfunction) stop by, and discuss Mynx's engineering of quadcopter video cards. Erin regales the story of asking a fursuiter for a hug, and having the suiter reply:

"I'm going to give you something better... follow me."
shuffles off to a side
dances while yipping HYPERPUPPYFURRYDANCEHYPERPUPPYFURRYDANCE

I go pee...and come back to find Paco's Taco Stroker stuck to the ceiling :| At some point, Paco's Taco Stroker was shot at Procy. A random person named JAAAAAKKKKKE (exactly 5 a’s and k’s) stops by and reveals he lives a few cities over. We discuss the finer points in life, like how expensive puppy play gear is.

EVENTUALLY I head out to play Whose Lion is it Anyway, where we learn roaches lived in snapple, Bad Dragon got their room by pitching their donges as wall decorations, and that their donges were up to 5% STD free. I paw at Axel's arm a fair amount. Airy owns the show with performances such as:

"So what play am I in?"
"NEW LINE"
"So what kind of act am I in?"
"NEW LINE"
"So when does the sex scene happen."

There was also a lot of shitting in basements, people kidnapping and having sex with seeing-eye dogs, fursuiters deepthroating microphones, and propositioning airplane guests who are drunk and not drunk at the same time. Between my cough and desire to waggle, I leave around 12:10AM and head to DANCE WITH CAMI

We waggle for a bit, RD shows up in suit and we take turns piggybacking each other while dancing. I run into Iris and we waggle for a bit. Airy suffers a stepped-on paw, so we head out for a bit.

It’s now just after 1AM - when it happens.

Since we didn't hear the fire alarms in our section of the hotel, we tried to stay inside as long as possible since neither of us were dressed for the 30F and breezy weather. Eventually con staff make us leave, and so we head outside. We run into Cami and RD, who provide Airyu and I with warm carpetsuit hugs (thanks to both of you :3) . The evacuation order extends the perimeter to a proper safe distance of across the street. At this point it starts looking serious - so we start trying to gather everyone together around 2AM. A few phone calls and texts later (in the stress of the moment communicating was difficult), we've gathered everyone but Iris together. It seems that people are going back into the hotel for a bit and we start to follow - but it was a false alarm, and we are sent back into the cold. With the help of a jacket from Liz (that apparently makes me look hot B) ) Sasha and I form the Find Iris Search Party, each of us on one side of the roughly line-shaped mass of furry refugees.

Along the way - I pass a fursuiter on the ground with someone kneeling next to them. It's always easy to say you'd do something in an emergency, but the fog of Not Knowing had clouded my judgement. After a few seconds I did ask the kneeling guy if there was an emergency to which he said no - I decided he probably knew more than I did, and left to continue searching. Eventually the crush of people was such that we couldn't go any further - Javs and I decided to turn around and search in the other direction. We pass Fritz and Chai here, and after a short exchange we head off again. I head toward the convention center and find the doors are locked, and Sasha hits the end of the line as well - we meet up again and head toward where we left the group and...I get a call from Iris at ~3AM.

Communicating is difficult since Iris is by dog show dogs barking at all the commotion - turns out, Iris was fine and already familiar with the area. Found a nice little corner to huddle up in (though not very warm) as well as a buddy who I forget the name of, followed the initial crush back into the dance room when the first false all-clear was given (I’m assuming after HAZMAT cleared things), filed back out when (also assuming here) the feds wanted a clean investigation area and re-evacuated, filed into the convention center and (finally) took out her phone to see my messages and contacted me - and the rest is history.

Except for the parts that came next. Shortly after the call, Javs and I reunite with the host and start migrating to the Hyatt-facing entrance of the convention center. A brief communication lapse occurs, but I manage to get another phone call through to Iris and draw her attention to us by jumping up and down. Now-reunited, we began to migrate to a place to finally (relatively) thaw and relax and sit. I run into kuisbright and we share a toasty hug. After we unwind for a few minutes and I start to doze off, we're told to move back even more. We ended up in the dusty loading dock area - colder, dirtier, and farther away from any official information. A drum performance on trashcans (excerpt at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5yOGGT0zEY - also the door where we holed up by is visible at 0:19. ALSO it’s a lot less bass-y and echoy in the video) , a lay-down-on-everyone train, lots of twittering and a strained waiting game involving idle walks and doing abso-fucking-nothing after hours of doing abso-fucking-nothing with no official information, we're finally cleared to leave the convention center and return to the Hyatt at 4:21AM.

The crush of fuzzies trying to get back in caused us to get separated - once we were inside it was a stop-and-shuffle game to get to the main area. After passing a con staff cordon restricting access to make the traffic in the main area manageable, it was a straight shot to our room. The main hotel definitely had a chlorine smell, even though the 9th floor stairwell was the source (though all I could discern with my perma-ruined nose was an acrid chemical smell).

5AMish, we finally get back to our room.

Paco’s Taco Stroker is still on the ceiling.

We pass the fuck out pretty quickly after such a full day.

SUNDAY

not much can compare with a night like last night.

Woke up, consuited and caught up with Muffinpaws. Wandered to Red Bar where we discussed Hacker Vietnam and days of DC past. Chilled for a bit, telepictionaried for a bit, packed for a bit, and then Red Bar'd to say goodbye and hug everyone. Mynx helpfully helped us pack and then smashed his butt and tail in our car window. Also we howled at a car in the garage, which proceeded to back up and drive away.

EPILOGUE

Not going to lie, GasCon 2014 (tm) wasn't so much a surreal experience for me as it was just another day to get past.

Things I learned:

Communication should be triply-clear - even when you direct someone to "The only christmas tree with all-blue lights", that leaves room for misinterpretation if the trees aren't conifer trees ("Christmas" trees). The person who I asked if there was an emergency? I'd pass them later with EMS carting off the passed-out fursuiter. Asking if things are an "emergency" might've spooked the guy, maybe he wasn't thinking clearly since his buddy was literally passed out on the ground, etc.

Take stock of your inventory - some of our group was caught out without jackets in literally freezing weather. While hugs were nice, taking shelter inside a nearby hotel would've been nicer.

Large crowds complicate things - evacuations are rarely well-planned events. It was a mild nuisance having to unsettle and move back each time a place filled up and more space was needed - going back as far as possible in the convention center especially would’ve allowed us (me) to nap undisturbed, and not have to re-warm the cold concrete floor. Rumors spread faster than wildfire, and getting separated in a herd was extremely easy.

While GasCon wasn't a life-threatening emergency in my realm, a little more foresight could've made things easier to bear, and might've been even more valuable in a more serious situation.

On a lighter note -

In future telepictionaries, round times should be put to a vote (not enforced otherwise) in >10 person groups; 1 and 4-5 minutes for sentence/drawing rounds seems to work. Signing names (and possibly adding numbers) for the first round helps in IDing who drew what (and which side is the start side for the poor documentor) however DRAWING IN THE CENTER OF THE PAGE should be non-negotiable because it’s hard to get the camera to focus on the entire page otherwise :@

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