Not really fond of ranting and being all emo, but just need to let this out (for the 3 who actually do read this).

Been feeling out of it frankly, like a loss of motivation. Actually, given my recent art slump and failure to keep Valleydog on a schedule (classwork not withstanding), I guess it is a loss of motivation. Like, I really wanna do another one of those vast-landscapey pieces I did last year, but just not feeling it. Like I hit a peak or something.

I'm just frustrated. Feel like I'm going nowhere. Not improving. I know I should do this for myself and my own sake and having nobody bat an eye (or maybe tell me in an off-comment days/weeks later... heck even adult art of all things attracts nothing). I don't wanna be known for spammy tweets and random social network postings; I'd rather wanna be known more for what I draw. I know this can be done by drawing more and diversify my works, but the encouragement isn't there; like a Catch-22.

Likewise, I feel like my audience is changing; chasing away faithful friends (like, though it really doesn't matter, getting removed from being a friend listed on a profile list does hurt a bit, however superficial) by my attempts at achieving aforementioned encouragement thru many means and frustration in doing so. In the process having them unintentionally and unwantingly replaced by an audience that seems to match my art level and comic quality (I am well aware that Valleydog is, quite frankly, rather mediocre. I do have many brilliant ideas that I'm wanting to put into such and know will be awesome, but just fall flat or come across horribly upon actually fleshing them out due to the comic format, to my chagrin).

Heck, I don't even know what my ideal audience is, or who to truly connect with. Save for mate, I feel rather distant to everyone; I don't interact beyond small talk; rather, I'm quiet and awkward. I know little tech skills, have little talent beyond drawing canine variants who all sound the same. Why do people watch me?

I'm just, like, I don't know what to do. I don't even. Blah...

Anywho, two cents for the night. Thanks for going through this (and much appreciation for doing so). Maybe it's the coffee.

tl;dr I just want my stuff to be seen.