I feel like this a lot too, which is why I have to keep my blinders on. Last night I did an open canvas with two far more superior artists and I honestly spent more time just watching them than I did on my own practice, even though I'm making great strides as a newb. I could handle it since they're friends, but people who aren't... nah, it'd be too much for me. I almost always need blinders, despite my personal philosophy being that I'm nothing more than a semi-coherent dust mote. :v Biting the bullet is incredibly admirable, but you can only take so many shots, so take care of yourself while you're doing it, k?