This is a vent journal, please feel free to ignore this.

Before anybody asks, no this isn't about you so don't worry. I looked at the list of people watching me. I can assure you that if this showed up in your notification feed THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU.

Also, yes I'm a little agitated right now.

Okay, so there's something that I've been stewing on for a little while now. I'm trying to make a few changes in my life. Every so often, I try and really focus on where I'm at, as a person. Over the last couple of weeks, I've noticed that some of the people I surround myself with aren't the most positive. I've been involved in a few discussions about topics that I honestly never thought I'd have to deal with. For example, just the other day I was on Telegram, in a reasonably large group chat. One of the people from that chat mentioned that his mother had been stabbed. Others in the chat responded how you might expect. People asked the guy to put the keyboard down and get her medical attention and call the police. The guy insisted that there was no way the police would help the situation at all. The reasoning was that A: It was a family affair and B: The police only exist to exacerbate crimes and make victims suffer more. Let that sink in real quick. If it weren't for the pictures, I'd think this guy was a troll.

Okay, so that's one guy right? One person that is just a total fuckwit and I need to not be around right? Well, except for the part where a few people started to agree with them about the police being bad guys. At that point, I had a real, "Why the fuck am I around these people?" moment.

This incident was really more of a catalyst for what I'm talking about rather than "The one thing" that caused it. Like I said, every so often I like to try and think about where I'm at as a person. I've come to realize that there are some people that I really can't stand to be around any more. So, that example I gave was kind of an extreme case. But my problem is that dealing with stuff like that seriously drains me. Like, I want to have reasonable expectations of people, but then I think about incidents like that example. Then I catch myself thinking, "Well, it's only a matter of time until someone else does something rather disappointing." I don't like that I'm thinking things like that. It's not fair to people I interact with on a regular basis. I find that the soft insult of low expectations can be one of the most damaging things there is. And that's kind of the core of the issue here. I don't want to be the person who has really low expectations for other people.

As I said at the onset, there are a few people I don't think I can be around amy more. Also, for the record, I was quite serious with the disclaimer. If you're currently watching me, I can guarantee that this journal is not about you. No need to worry.