Up until a few days ago, I've been fine. I found it easy to be optimistic and positive about everything. I was always the one who had stuff under control and would listen to other people talk about their troubles without feeling down myself. Now I'm crying for the first time in years and the full meaning of "alone" is in my mind. I don't know what's wrong and I'm scared. I went back and read weeks and months of cute messages between myself and my ex because I wanted to see happy me again and came across the breakup stuff and it's finally actually hurting. Even though the only difference in our relationship is a lack of "I love you" and hearts, it still feels so much worse even if the difference is tiny. Just days earlier we were talking about some furry conventions that we could go together, and even maybe ones in his area so it would be more convenient. Then suddenly he doesn't want me anymore. We don't get along well enough...

I want IRL friends. I want a boyfriend or a girlfriend or someone that'll listen to me and be close with me. The closest things I have are people I have no chance of meeting. I did the math. If my Steam group is an accurate representation of the world, I'm the only one in my state who is in it. Even if you count the states near me, there are still only one other person. Not enough to matter.

I still love you T. I want you back. I'll try harder if it'll get you more interested in me. I want to be a better me for you.

I need a hug.
~frosty