How ya doin'?
Like, dude! I have had the most totally radical idea EVER!! Seriously dude, this could, like CHANGE EVERYTHING!!
Sooooooooooo, ya know 'art?' Ya know that thing that is like real fancy pictures and stuff? Ya know, the things that people hang on walls in those gallery places that smell like dust and old things but have like toooooooootttallllly sweet wine when they have one of those late night exhibits! YaknowwhatImean!
Like and, like, dude, oh gawd this is so totally gnarly! SQQQWWWWUUUUUUUUEEEE!!
Okay, okay, calm down Ziggy baby, ya don't wanna embarrass yourself, not like you did at the Karaoke night at the church fund raiser...
So! I was at the Fur Angeles City Kollection; a fancy art and fashion night which free wine and lil' nibbles on trays and some smoking hot ladies in OHMYGAWD outfits! Hehe!
And there was this painting, like a body print that this totally bohemian looking human lady did, well, she was doing... Its 'live art' darling, like, I'd explain it to you buuuuuuuut ya know... being the totally rad artist that I am I may use like, totally complex terminology that you won't understand like, phenomenology, mise-en-scène, easel...
Anyways! There was this real stuff old guy who said "But is it art? All she's doing is rolling around!" And it was at that point I was going to interject and inform the gentleman that art -in all its forms- and its worth is not measured in the method used but what the art says to you the consumer, there is no definite answer, no "yes" and "no" its who it speaks to your soul and the impact it has on you be that in a purely idiosyncratic aesthetic way or something more emotional, something that resonates with you an takes you on a journey of self discovery and enlightenment...
I was going to say that but my ears started to ring and my head started hurting, things where getting cloudy and weird... I dunno why... GASP! MAYBE I WAS THINKING!! Oh gawd!
That's why my head hurt!!
A-anyway, its then that it came to me... I COULD DO THAT!! Not grumble at the value of art or its place in greater society or the uncomfortable impact it has on lesser minds WHO ARE ESSENTIALLY JUST BOURGEOISIE!... Ahhhh! Dude! It happened again!! DUDE BRAIN STAP!!
Like I was saying, the idea was, if she can get an audience like this and, well, that art of hers is gonna sell for big money I COULD DO IT TOO!
Like, dude, seriously! I CAN!
Like dude, cause, the way I see it, you can't spell "art" without "A and T" and you can't spell "goat" without " A and T" either! AND you can't spell "Arse" without "A" WHICH IS WHAT YOU NEED TO SPELL ALL THREE!!
ITS LIKE IT WAS DESTINED TO BE!!
So, I got me some paint, and a canvas and painted up my butt and slammed it down on the canvas! Caused my house boat to shake around a little but dude, the end result LOOKS AWESOME!!
ITS A HEART! Cause I heart buttz! Te-hehe!
I am gonna sell this and am gonna make SO MUCH DOUGH! Which is slang for money! But also I may make some dough too! Butt shaped art and butt shape cakes!!
Oooooooo! I can sell both when I open my big butt nightclub!
THIS IS GONNA ROCK!!