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more stuff by tzarVOLVER (critique requested)

more stuff (critique requested)

tzarVOLVER

I completed these two paintings this week. I feel like a fucking boss.

PLEASE CRITIQUE

STORY

Basically, this is like a second earth. Original one didn't fair so well, got fried. That weird tilted structure in the back is actually a gigantic ship that carried a bunch of people to the new planet. There are a bunch of them all over this new planet and they serve as a epicenters for the cities. The robot is actually one that was made on old Earth and has an artificial soul. Sort of like an AI. I'ts like the only one that knows how to fix a defense grid in place on the new planet to shield it from massive solar flares. The chick is the daughter of a robotics repair shop owner (convenient yeah?) and the robot (who I haven't named yet) has been in their possession for a long time now. These two are bros and the chick cares for him. She does't really know about his real purpose. no one really does. The robot doesn't even know much about it. (I think??) I have a really bad habit of writing myself into a corner. this story is actually a tie in to another story I wrote 2 years ago for my first Illustration class

Submission Information

Views:
379
Comments:
1
Favorites:
11
Rating:
General
Category:
Visual / Digital

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Comments

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    From the old earth they carried robots and the stores from Anytown, USA. :)

    I don't really have any chops critique the layout itself. To my eyes the perspective and lighting is coherent and seems absolutely fine. The juxtaposition between the ship in the background and the Anytown shops works nicely.

    The character design for the robot is good overall, you've done a decent job of showing age (with the rust coming from paint scratches and dings, not just appearing out of the blue). The big complaints I have about him are purely technical: some of the joints don't seem like they should move, or sufficiently so. His upper arms seem like pistons, and there's no real "joint" at the elbow. His hips and knees look like they have connections that would only allow a limited amount of rotation, whereas the hips are a ball-in-socket joint. The shoulders don't have that problem, and you've done a much better job there.

    If the whole illustration was more stylized or cartoony, the design would work without a hitch, but since you're pushing for a bit more realism (as I see it), it stands out. Mind you, I work with machinery as a job, so I'll be more pedantic about that. ;)

    As for the robot's companion, she kind of looks like she was brought over from old earth as well. The other three humans in the scene look like they would be pulled from today, and she's a space cadet-slash-engineer. That could work, if you were to make Kane Robotics (I'm assuming that's her shop) stand out more in contrast to the other stores, to strengthen her connection with the robot. Or she could be dressed more contemporarily, to provide a greater contrast between the robots and ship, and people.

    The story's fine! It's a good set-up, with plenty of questions that you have flexibility answering. I think you could do a lot with it. :)

    Hopefully this is something along the lines of what you were looking for. I like it overall, and think you should try doing more with those two!