UPDATED
He's the mess. Get it? hahahahahahahahaaaaaaa
Ah very helpful critique!
The picture didn't start off as being this emotional, I had already added the text before I really realized where I was going with it. But yeah I can see how its a bit distracting now.
The tears for sorta thrown in and even after submitting this, the more and more I saw it the more it bothered me.
As for people in the foreground, I did contemplate it but then the setting is suppose to be him leaving the store after closing, sorta reflecting on that job is all he has.
I do wanna edit this now though!
Link
3EggnogFatality
Ouch. How to get this from being totally emotional?
Nailed the sensation of isolation. A typical precursor element to suicidal tendencies. The bright light helps set him apart, though in the background, from us. I wonder if you might try making the peripheral shelves, closest to us head more to black. I wonder if you could balance most of the foreground going to black right and left without loosing his location. Thinking a soft focus phenomenon, the dirty halo of all the shit we're paying attention to and missing him among.
Perhaps loose the text on the 'hoops' box? Put text elsewhere so there are fewer elements around him pulling eyes and some other elements making the eye move around the room, unable to find anything as clear and defined as him.
Not sure if Tears are even needed. The sad face is a perfect sell in my mind. Tears, especially comical tears may push past the 'sale' of choking loneliness. I think that, if outwardly, he was behaving normal, completely innocuous but torn up inside, it would intensify the phenomenon.
Would putting figures in the foreground help increase the sense of isolation? Perhaps bodies passing in front of him such that we get a glimpse of a figure crying out for help amid a sea of faces who don't care? Might needlessly complicate the foreground.