Copypasted from FA submission:

Terrestrial Mercurian beast the Flugratcher (Gnorpish mutation), hunted for its meat and for its ugly mug to mount on plaques above fireplaces.

This is a gift for my grandpa, who hasn't been having the best of years.

My Grandpa is the very definition of eccentric. He loves aliens and UFOs and collects meteorite hunks and listens to Art Bell, the whole deal. He's built a dune buggy from the ground up which he's driven through the mountains, and he's made massive, beautiful welded metal sculptures of unicorns and eagles and pigs. In my living room I have an awkwardly tall (probably close to 5 feet?) hexagonal table fitted with a glass inlay that he built. It is meant to have quartz crystals set on each point of the hexagon with a Tesla coil in the middle of the table, and while the thing's crackling electricity from crystal to crystal you're supposed to sit beneath it and be mentally transported to anywhere you can imagine, like inducing an out of body experience.

My Grandpa built it and used it once and went to Mercury. He said that he remembered very distinctly standing alongside a massive boulder and could feel the intense heat radiating off of it.

Eventually I would like to, um... reinstall the crystals and Tesla coils, if only that's because that's its proper setup. Right now it's being used to hold a terrarium full of carnivorous plants and four planters full of other various non-animals so that they can see out the living room window and get sunlight until they're ready to be transplanted. It had just been sitting in my Mom's garage for the last three years or so, and she'd intended to saw the legs down to a less unwieldy height and use it as a side table or something, but hadn't gotten around to it so it just sat in the way and she bitched about it constantly so I took the damn thing. It's like a family heirloom, except nobody really knows what to do with it. But that's what makes it extra super special.

My family affectionately calls it the "Uranus Mobile".

My creative endeavors at this point in my life feel humble against his lifetime's portfolio of weird-ass projects. But I'm young still, and there's nothing to compete against or outdo... just expand upon and reimagine and celebrate and breathe life into again; to metaphorically drag the Uranus Mobile out of the garage, dust it off, and put some crystals and Tesla coils on top and go to Mercury. Know what I mean?!?!?!

This? Well, this is just a stupid critter for him to hang in his office. Grandma will kill me.