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Zachariah the Ranger by mordie1001 (critique requested)

Zachariah the Ranger

Zachariah

Zachariah walked through the frozen forests of the north, tracking his prey. The wolf ranger scanned the ground in front of him as he walked, his practiced stride leaving hardly a print in the snow. A chill wind blows, the trees groaning under a load of heavy ice. In the distance a limb cracks and falls, Zach drops to his knees and reaches for an arrow, pulling the bow taught and aiming in the direction of the sound in one lightning fast movement. He lets out a slow breath as he relaxes his grip on the arrow, putting it back in it's quiver and shaking his head. “Easy Zach, it's just goblins you're hunting, not ogres, or trolls, just goblins. You've killed more than a three score of them by yourself, and countless others with hunting parties,” he muttered to nobody in particular. He pulls his hood back and runs a paw through his gray hair, looking up into the sky. “Another storm is coming... Great,” he growls as he stalks back off after his prey. He followed the trail for another hour before the storm hit, and it came down hard. Ice coming down and stabbing at his exposed paws, the snow soaking through his thick cloak and the wind blowing so hard it stole what little warmth could be had. He needed to find shelter quickly or he would freeze in the coming storm.

Zach scanned the area hurriedly for any kind of shelter; a small dell shielded from the wind, a cave, even a thick tangle of brush. Some place that he wouldn't be buried in snow, where he could keep a fire lit. Then all of a sudden he stumbled into a small log building, he could not recall anything like that in this area but with the storm getting worse every second this seemed like as good a place as any. As he closed the door behind him and blinked his eyes a few times to adjust to the dim light. Zach scanned the room, resting his paw on the hilt of his longsword. The small building was eerily silent except for the wind whistling through the cracks in the log frame like the keening of a banshee. All that was in the room was a small bed, a fireplace on the right wall with a small cooking pot and a bit of wood, and a dilapidated old table in the middle. He moved over to the small table, it had a few random carvings in it, and one the stools was toppled over, one of the legs broken. The place seemed live in, at least it used to be. “Well, I might as well get comfortable. I hope the previous owners don't mind me staying.” Zach muttered as he went about starting a fire. He set some logs in the fireplace and set a spark under some dry moss he had gathered for tender earlier. The wood caught quickly and soon there was a decent blaze going. Zach stood up and stretched, re-examining the room and taking his time and walking around the place.

The bed consisted of a sturdy oaken frame with a rough blanket of coarse wool, laying in tatters across a straw and pine needle mattress. Not the most comfortable thing to sleep on but better than his bedroll and blanket. He grabbed the broken stool and tossed it over by the wood pile, if it got too cold he'd use it and perhaps the table for extra heat. He looked at the table, taking notice of the carvings. The were of a flowing design of seemingly random items, deer, foxes, wolves, rabbits, otters, many different creatures and objects slowly spiraling around the outer edge of the table. “Interesting, very interesting. I wonder who used to live here,” Zach thought as he traced his finger around the designs, marveling in there design. He grabbed the remaining stool and sat next to the fire, taking out his pipe and grabbing a loose stick to light it. Wrapping up in his cloak and blowing a smoke ring at the fire. “Well, I won't be able to track that band of goblins with all that snow coming down. I might be good, but not that good.” Zach mused, “I'll make my way back to the encampment and tell the head ranger I lost them I guess.” He shrugged and propped his feet up by the fire. Slowly he nodded off to sleep, the patterns and animals from the table slowly circling in his mind.

He was floating in a star filled abyss, these creatures swirling around him, one by one the flew at him, raking their claws across his face, his legs, arms, torso, anywhere they could reach. They didn't do any damage, leaving no marks, but the pain was there, an intense and powerful cold that froze down to the marrow. He screamed, but no sound could escape from his open maw, his breath stolen from the attacks. He drew his sword but it fell away, useless in his pain wracked hands, he punched and kicked, his attacks going through the feral specters. Then as suddenly as it started, the attacks ceased. The aspects floated around him slowly, watching as he shuddered and uncurled from the small ball he had wrapped himself in. Zach looked up to the specter in front of him, a brightly glowing fox, sitting there serenely and flicking its tail slowly from side to side.

“You are of strong will and mind to withstand the assault that has just been laid upon you. This was a test of your strength, you did not die as many other before you have, for what the mind comprehends becomes reality, the pain you feel is indeed real.” The phantom vulpine spoke in a voice as cold and otherworldly as her appearance. “There is another of the chosen in a nearby town.” As she said this the surrounding void coalesced and they were flying through the air, speeding over plains and rivers, mountains and valleys, to a small town nestled at the foot of some mountains. The scene flew downward into the streets centering on a black feline running down the main thoroughfare and turning down an alleyway before coming up to a dead end. She didn't stop though but ran 6 feet up the wall before spring off and catching a roof nearby. She turned and looked down into the alley as guards swarmed into it. She brushed her black hair, tipped with bright blue out of her green eyes then continued running across the snow covered rooftops as the scene faded back into the void.

The fox spoke again “she too has passed our tests, and you must seek her out.” With that said they spectral animals started to fade out. “Wait! How am I supposed to find her I don't even know her name!” Zach cried out as they faded. Then he bolted awake, his pipe falling to the floor and the fire burning low. “Uuugh, just a dream. But it felt so real.” He shuddered, remember the attack, then the vision of the town. He wondered again how he was going to find this place. Then suddenly, at the edge of his hearing, a voice as quiet as a gust of wind said, “You will find a way.”

  • Mordie

Zachariah the Ranger (critique requested)

mordie1001

Just a short story I wrote up. I have another one that ties into this. Format didn't save, silly .txt only uploads.

This is a rough draft until I can fix the formatting.

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