Sign In

Close
Forgot your password? No account yet?

Prologue by foxgamer01 (critique requested)

Prologue

A child, no more than ten, sat alone in the rain-soaked ground, bundled in black and gray clothing. A cloak hung over his left arm, and a hood over his head. His feet lay bare of any shoes and socks. He adjusted the scarf around his nose and mouth. Any sigh he made remained muffled, the only sign being a slight movement on the scarf.

A tree stood behind him, a part of a forest next to a town. Despite the number of trees, green grass grew all around the woods, with the only brown being a path. Various animals hid between the trees, though none approached the boy. When the child came, they learned quickly not to hunt him.

A couple walked down a dirt path nearby, with the male of the two holding an umbrella. Each step they took caused the mud to give way to their boots. They laughed with each other, with the lady of the two leaning against the man. Despite the laughter, the child did not lift his head.

The lady of the two stopped when she spotted the boy. She held a sympathetic expression on her face, like a mother finding an abandoned child. She took a step toward him before the man held her back. She turned to him in confusion and disgust, but the man pointed. She followed, with him pointing at the boy’s shadow, and she paled. She nodded, though her sympathetic expression remained. The two walked down the path, leaving behind the boy.

The boy did not follow, instead remaining where he lay. No matter the place, it ended the same for the past five years. He lurked around in the shadows; someone always tried to help but ended up dead, word spread around, and a mob forced him out. Part of him wondered if he should leave before the mob stage began.

While he thought of that, footsteps came from the side. The child lowered his head further, the lights in his sea blue eyes already dead. The steps paused in front of him, with someone standing before him. It took him several seconds to glance at this newcomer.

The newcomer, a child at a similar age, stood before him. His black hair, darker than night, glistened in the dusk sunlight coming from his right. A green vest hung over his black long-sleeved shirt with a turtleneck around his neck. His steely blue eyes stared at sea blue, colder than winter. The sitting child huddled closer to himself when the standing one stepped forward.

“It’s the thing with grown-ups,” the black-haired child said. He approached until he stood three feet away. “They talk big of helping others in need, like us kids, but they’re quick to turn away when someone is in need.” He rubbed behind his right ear. “In your case, though, I can see why.”

The sitting child glanced away to his left, where his shadow lay. He clutched his hands tight, with fear crawling all over him. Part of him screamed to run as fast as possible if only to save the one before him. Instead, he remained sitting there as though pinned by a stronger will.

The black-haired child bent his knees. “The name’s Ash.” He extended his left arm forward. “I fear no shadow.”

The other child gasped and twisted his head up. Their eyes met again, and time froze for them. Despite his young age, Ash held determination stronger than adults many times his age. The sitting child, inch by inch, lifted his left arm. The cloak slipped from it, exposing his bandaged arm, wrapped from his swollen fingers and hand down to his armpit and shoulder. He breathed, feeling echoes of pain as he inched closer. Their shadows from the dusk sunlight lay opposite each other, never meeting the other.

Prologue (critique requested)

foxgamer01

Finally, the prologue to Once Upon a Time in England and The Werewolf Connection is here.


. . . What? I have to put the prologue at the beginning of a story? Eh, I want to end it with a prologue instead.


Before anyone says it, I know this scene is out of left field. That is primarily because it is connected to a greater arc I planned. An arc that I only wrote one other story at the time of this story's posting.


This is what happens when stuff gets written and posted out of order.


Honestly, this part, above all, is why I am opening a Q&A session. I have never done something like this, so I hope it goes well.


In any case, I hope you guys enjoy this segment of the story arc that I called 'His Bandaged Arm.'


Art in thumbnail is made by Foxena Foxena


If you enjoy my writings, please consider donating. ^.|.^ http://ko-fi.com/foxgamer01
Also, if you want to be a supporter on Patreon, here is the link. https://www.patreon.com/foxgamer01

Submission Information

Views:
90
Comments:
0
Favorites:
0
Rating:
General
Category:
Literary / Story