[Vent] The Rain

"I used to like to go for walks in the rain. Throw on an old shirt and pants and just wander. No socks. No shoes. Just my feet against the pavement.
Stepping into puddles, feeling the cold water wash over my feet, letting the rain pitter patter on my body.
Something about it was almost meditative in its actions. It didn't matter to me if I was getting soaking wet or cold
I miss being able to do that, Im trapped in my own mistakes enable to break out of a repetitive loop. You dont understand, how could you. Its the little things in life that matter most to me. Take that away and you loose motivation, your happiness, your will.
The closest I can manage now is the shower, but that too raises question.
"what are you doing in there..."
"your wasting time..."
"are you trying to escape..."
"are you lieing to me"

Just listen, breath let go...
You dont understand...
How could you..."

This was a piece I did when i was getting super depressed. I always felt bad about doing the little things i liked to because my ex thought they were stupid or pointless. that or he didnt want to partake when i asked or he would be be mad if i just took off for a little walk. When you live for the little things and you can no longer have them, you dont live anymore.

Art © Ceowolf
Character © Ceowolf

~~Note: This is an older piece of artwork and does not reflect my current feelings.