Sign In

Close
Forgot your password? No account yet?

White Line by Capps (critique requested)

Dancing on the white line
Almost to hilarity and almost to disaster
On the white line, such a thin line
And if you cross it you will surely die

A dangerous ballerinas act
For once you cross you won’t come back
The ballerinas twist and twirl
Illusions of a different world
Fiery passions won’t recede
Forcing you to crave the need
To take the darkness out of night
With simplicity of white

Dancing on the white line
Almost to hilarity and almost to disaster
On the white line, such a thin line
And if you cross it you will surely die

The ballerinas final act
You’ve crossed the line you can’t come back
The final song, the curtain call
It’s too late now you’ve lost it all
Chalk lines for your body traced
Memories of you soon erased
The rain will fall and by the light
You’ll pass into eternal night

Dancing on the white line
Almost to hilarity and almost to disaster
On the white line, such a thin line
And if you cross it you will surely die

White Line (critique requested)

Capps

Some people in the Weasyl IRC convinced me to start submitting some of my writing and this was the first thing I went for. I had submitted it earlier but it looked so terrible submitted by google docs so I made up a nicer text file for it and a better icon.

Let me know what you think of it!

Submission Information

Views:
236
Comments:
0
Favorites:
0
Rating:
General
Category:
Literary / Poetry / Lyrics