Teleporter Accident [Commission for KingDead] by AlkaliRoo

Teleporter Accident [Commission for KingDead]

KingDead Fusion Story

“I can’t believe you would come to SciCon and not cosplay!” Alkali scolded his companion.

“I do that every other day of the year. It’s my job,” KingDead said with a shrug.

“That’s the whole point! You’d be great at it!” the meerkat cried, throwing his arms into the air. “The one time a year you come to a sci-fi con out of suit and you just waste it by not wearing a Trek uniform.”

King blushed, patting the bag hanging from his beefy shoulder. “I have to keep the uniform with me though; I’ll bring a Star Trek costume next time, I promise.” He tucked a bit of peeking green and red fabric into the bag. A superhero’s uniform had to stay hidden at all times. Today though, King wasn’t in his superhero persona. It was his day off! Instead he wore a green tank top stretched over his bulky torso and a pair of running shorts. His meerkat buddy was decked out in full Star Trek regalia. A red shirt, of course.

They made quite the unusual duo. Seven feet of bulky, muscular wolf, walking next to a three-foot-nothing, thin-as-a-rail meerkat down the aisles of SciCon was enough to turn anyone’s head. Mostly the attention was of the ‘gaping awe’ variety, but a few of the nerdier ones looked at King with open disgust. Alkali was dressed with the proper amount of nerd cred that most of the gatekeepers would ignore him, but King was a tall, beefy, jockish-looking wolf.

“Woah, they brought the transporter! The real one, from the TV set. King. We have to get a picture on it,” Al said, pointing his finger at a winding queue surrounding a wooden set. It looked perfect. Each of them had seen hundreds of episodes, but the chance to see it up close was too good to pass up.

As they got in line, a chihuahua with thick bottlenose glasses turned and sized them up. He sniffed at Alkali. “Aren’t you in the wrong place? Star Trek nerds are here, and your costume is a disgrace to star fleet.”

“I’m in the right place already,” Al whimpered at the little canine. He meant for it to sound threatening, but he’d been hit where it hurt: in his nerd credentials.

The chihuahua didn’t back off either. He tried to go in for the kill. “If you’re such a fan, tell me. How many toes does Data have on his left foot as shown in episode 4 of season 2-”

“Lieutenant Commander Data doesn’t have any toes on his feet,” KingDead interrupted. The wolf stepped forward, nothing more than a slight leaning forward. But this simple tactic had its intended effect. The chihuahua’s tail tucked immediately.

“It’s part of the expanded universe books. Now like my friend said, we’re in the right place already,” KingDead continued with a proud grin. He raised both arms in a double-gun flex. The chihuahua, sufficiently cowed by a simultaneous show of beef and nerdery, turned back around and paid especially close attention to his phone for the rest of their wait in the queue.

“Thanks, big guy,” Al said as he raised his fist to wait for a bump. “I can always count on you to have my back. But was the flex at the end necessary?”

King grinned deviously, before returning the meerkat’s fist bump with a hand easily 3 times as large. “No, but it felt pretty good.”

Alkali prodded the wolf in his leg. “Neeeerrrrrd, you big beefy nerd.”

“What? Patrols don't last all day and I needed something to do back at my HQ!” he defended. King puffed out his cheeks and blushed. He enjoyed being a nerd, but was too embarrassed to admit it. Especially not to Alkali; the meerkat already never stopped teasing him.

They had to wait for nearly an hour. It was boring, and by the end Al’s paws hurt enough to ask his wolfy companion to give him a ride. The meerkat swung his legs as he sat on King’s shoulder. They approached the sound stage and…

“Wow it's just like the show!” Alkali exclaimed, jumping off the superhero. At the back of the stage was a prop platform, with a circular roof built over the top of it. It was all open air, so anyone could walk up or away from it at any time. Bullseye targets were painted in white, forming a circle for cast members of the show to stand atop before being green-screened away.

“Thank goodness they make these things tall enough that I don't have to duck,” King said with an appreciative nod to the height of the teleporter’s roof. “Imagine making one of these things large enough to fit a giant, much less me.”

“You could always be your normal size you overgrown dork.”

King woofed his disapproval. “Yeah, but this is kinda fun to be bigger than everyone. Plus I can scope out all the cool stuff easier.” He peered over at the side of the sound stage and noticed the computer, sitting atop a desk that appeared to be made out of cheap plastics, painted with retro-future colors. King quirked an eyebrow; that sure looked like a whole bunch of wires coming out of the computer, and crossing the stage over to the teleporter. Weird. There wasn’t any reason to put a real computer in here. Especially without a camera rolling. This wasn’t even a real set.

Before the wolf could ponder over that brain teaser much longer, Alkali tugged at the hem of his shorts. It was the only part he could reach.

“Come on King. It’s our turn to get on the teleporter. The camera guy is all ready, he’s going to take our picture and then green screen us somewhere else,” the meerkat said. The wolf shrugged and walked up the stairs. They creaked under the weight of his paws. Apparently, despite the size of the teleporter set, it was not built with the sturdiest of materials.

“Careful there,” Alkali chastised. “This set is valuable. You can’t go pulling a KingDead here and accidentally destroy this. It’s historic.”

King huffed and flexed a single arm. “Maybe the designers should’ve considered the needs of big beefy wolves.”

Alkali scoffed. “No designer in the world could’ve prepared for this much dorkwolf.”

The cameraman whistled to get their attention, directing their gazes to two circles on the floor with red tape on the center. Apparently, that was the spot to stand. The pair shuffled over and looked out at the camera. With a smile and a countdown, the camera flashed. King started to walk away when Alkali squeaked and pulled at the wolf’s clothes again, trying to hold him back from leaving prematurely.

“Not finished yet! We need to get teleported next!” he squeaked. King’s ears perked and he took a step backward to the marked position on the set.

Behind the console of the computer screen, a squirrel technician struggled with the cables inside the big, fake desk. There were hundreds. Maybe even thousands. Far more inside than any prop had a right to house. Because this technician wasn’t just an electrical engineer; he was an electrical engineer with a hobby for Star Trek. So when he had the chance to work on the ACTUAL set of the teleporter, bringing it from show to show for pictures with fans, he jumped at the chance. He’d been researching ways to make the lighting effect on the teleporter more impressive, so after a few Wikipedia-dives and several weeks of wiring changes, the squirrel was ready to try the equipment for its inaugural run. If only he could just get these last wires in place… got it!

The squirrel popped up from behind the desk and pressed a single button on the console labeled ‘Energize’. Instantly the lights from above and below the teleporter stage turned on, shedding cylinders of light around the meerkat and wolf. They both looked sufficiently awed, practically ‘ooh’ing on cue.

There was one major problem. The teleporter was fully functional now. Through some quirk of science, plot device, and engineering, the added components to the set had turned a once fake machine into a literal teleporter. And Alkali and King were about to be the first to experience it.

At first neither of them realized anything was wrong. As their bodies slowly dissolved into a flash of bright light, leaving a trail of vaguely humanoid shaped sparkles behind, both the meerkat and the wolf were still smiling wide and carefree. The computer responsible for teleporting both of them blinked a yellow ERROR message. Apparently, teleporting 2 people at the same time had not been part of the teleporter’s design. And so, in addition to introducing far too much mass into the machine, it was going to spit them out the other end together in a single location. The wiring beneath the console sparked and sputtered. A pungent, black-as-night smoke poured out from the computer. Wherever Alkali and King were headed, it looked to be a one-way trip. The last picture on the screen before it went black showed a destination, far far away, out in the darkness of space.

Far away from Earth, a wolf and meerkat hybrid floated among the planets and stars. He opened his eyes and saw… darkness. Space mostly. With something bright floating just past his pectorals. With a grunt the wolfkat pinwheeled his arms until he floated in the right direction to see the sun, barely the size of a marble and floating in the inky black like a firefly. Now that he had a source of light to use, his eyes widened as he inspected the rest of his body. His arms were… thick. Massive really. A green and red shirt stretched from his wrist all the way across his pectorals, barely clinging to the shelves of muscle without tearing. A large, red ‘K’ proclaimed loudly that this was KingDead, but somehow it didn’t feel right. His tail was… longer, and thicker. And his face felt much less wolfy than usual too.

“What a ride. Something feels… off. I think we may have fused; that looked a whole lot like a teleporter out of the TV show- wait. Why am I talking to myself? There’s just… one of me. Huh.” He wasn’t sure what to call himself, or even what to do anymore. One half wanted to get back to normal and make sure the planet was okay, the other half… really wanted to try out the new powers of this fused body.

The fusion squinted down at the sun as it slowly started to drift toward his chest. “I’m not even sure how we can survive in space like it's a nice 72 degrees. Hmm.” The wolfkat’s arms crossed over his chest, and he proceeded to spout pseudoscience for the next 10 minutes. “And that's why it's totally safe to get huge out here,” he finished with a thoughtful nod.

“Woah. Since when did I learn to be that smart?” he mused. The fusion shook his head, still muttering. “Nnnff. Al’s smarts and King’s size. This combo doesn’t feel quite right.”

Unfortunately for him, that thought process would soon be interrupted by a thermal blast between his shoulder blades. The wolfkat grunted as he felt the breath knocked from his chest. It stung, but he could feel it hadn’t done any lasting damage. He slowly turned around to see what was menacing him, with such a cowardly shot to the back. Floating just a few relative inches away from his muzzle was a fleet of ships. Enormous, powerful, a feat of alien engineering… thousands of ships, a fleet capable of destroying worlds… and just barely the size of a grain of sand floating in front of the cosmic wolfkat’s nose.

A broad grin spread over the fused duo’s face. “Oohhhh. Now here’s something we can agree on. Gotta protect the solar system from an alien threat.”

The flagship of this fleet, a ship easily the size of a planet, tried in vain to turn around. Never in this race’s history had they ever encountered an enemy that size or strength. It shrugged off their strongest weapons with nothing more than a grunt! The command was issued across the entire fleet at once: retreat immediately. Scatter. Run away as fast as possible. It was all too little, too late. The massive muzzle of that titanic, furry monster opened wide and a tongue that could smother stars licked their entire fleet in a single movement.

The fusion licked his lips, savoring the tiny metallic taste as it played across his taste buds. That was strangely satisfying. Neither half was willing to take responsibility for the way they’d chosen to save the solar system, but they both agreed it tasted good. His tongue wetted his lips yet again, hungrily. If those ships tasted good… what else could he find that would be equally tasty at a cosmic size? Al’s devious influence was starting to creep in when green electricity erupted from all across his body.

The fused meerkat and wolf realized that something was activating KingDead’s old powers. The fire inside their collective chest rose in temperature, forcing him to double over as he rapidly expanded. The very solar system they’d protected just moments ago was brushed aside like dust, lost against the hide of a growing superhero. His tail snaked out into the darkness, swatting away asteroids and stars. His body bulked up, straining even the super strong fabric of KingDead’s supersuit. He’d need to consider going with less clothing in the future if this Hulk-like power burst stuck around.

“The quantum energies from that sci-fi teleporter have supercharged my growth powers… I can’t stop it…” he said through gritted teeth. They’d need to learn to work together to hold back the surging power before the entire Milky Way galaxy was scattered to the winds. Alkali was particularly difficult to convince… if the meerkat side of this fusion had his way, he’d let the growth continue forever. But the wolf part of him was persistent, wrestling down that desire. By the time the wolfkat had enough control over himself to feel comfortable opening his eyes, the milky way was circling in front of his eyes like a tiny pinwheel. It couldn’t have been larger than the palm of his hand.

And that’s when a familiar urge returned. Seeing the little galaxy float there, the duo felt their stomach rumble. It was so fragile, and at this size… he was an actual threat to the safety of the galaxy. So where else could he put everyone to keep them safe? The creeping threat of his continued growth ate away at the back of his mind. And at the same time he felt oddly hungry.

Everyone in the galaxy looked up in awe as the black backdrop of space was turned a muted pink color as a wolf’s mouth opened wide and surrounded the area around their galactic home with a single bite. “Safest place in the universe now,” he muttered, the simple words rearranging whole arms of the spiral shaped galaxy.

Teleporter Accident [Commission for KingDead]


16 March 2019 at 14:41:18 MDT

Two nerds, Alkali and KingDead, go to a sci-fi convention for nerdy reasons. But that teleporter set looks oddly realistic. What could possibly go wrong when they get on the pad together at the same time?

This Story Includes:

Thanks to KingDead for commissioning this story, AND thanks to KitsuneKit for making the cover art!

You can find all the people involved below!
And art is by KitsuneKit!