TWELVE-EPILOGUE (mild cussing)

Aldin scampered about collecting butternuts as a camera drone recorded him. He buried some as a wild cousin would. Others he stashed in a small knapsack inside a hollow at the base of a tree, which put to bed any thoughts one might have watching the footage as to whether or not he was a wild cousin. When filled, he carried the knapsack to the hovercraft and emptied it into a larger sack. He then went back and gathered more. Karl the skunk watched footage of this on two different monitors. The leaves on the deciduous trees around them were starting to change color.

“I think that’s enough footage for today,” stated as he powered-down the drone and started to disassemble it in order to store it for the return trip.

Aldin paused, drooping his tail. “But I have not filled my sack yet. It’s only half-full. And these butternuts are wonderful.”

“I’ll take your word for it.”

“Have you ever tried one?” Aldin quickly stripped the husk off one, leaving a little bit of yellowish stain on his paws and offered it up to the skunk. “Go ahead.”

Karl hesitated for a moment and then took the offered nut and bit into it and chewed slowly. It was softer than he expected and did have a buttery taste. He was impressed. “That is tasty.”

“Yes, and I think they will be even better after roasting.”

“You’re trying to turn me into a squirrel, aren’t you, Embassahder? First you talk about teaching me to climb trees. Now you’re getting me to nibble on raw tree nuts. Next, you’ll be getting me to gather some with you.”

Aldin scuffed a paw. “Well, I was not going to ask, but it would help me fill that sack quicker. But you have nothing to worry about. My father studied genetics, not me. I’m sure if he was here and you asked, he could transform you into a squirrel. Me, not likely.”

Karl stared at Aldin over the statement about what his father could do. Aldin simply shrugged, turned, and continued to gather butternuts. He called back over his shoulder, “And I have not forgotten that promise. I am serious if you want to learn to climb, I’ll teach you, but you will need to grow your nails out like the others.” His knapsack filled again, he quickly scurried to the hovercraft to empty it into the sack.

“I’m still thinking about that,” Karl replied as he packed away the monitors. “But we need to get back to campus.”

“Just two more trips to fill the sack.”

“Why?”

Aldin paused. “It is the wild cousin instincts in me. I need to gather food like this because,” he paused and said the next line in a very serious tone, “Winter is coming.”

Karl looked at him nonplussed. “So?”

Aldin shook his head. Of course Karl wouldn’t get the reference. “A squirrel must always plan for the future. But I agree, we do need to get back, even if my sack is not full.” (drooptail) “I will have to come back out later. In about a klick-and-a-half I have an appointment I need to keep with a law counselor.”

“I thought you were finished with that trial a week ago.”

“Yes, I am, but as I just said, a squirrel must always plan for the future. I need to get a will written.”

“You have few possessions to worry about. What? Do you plan to leave these butternuts to your roommates?”

Aldin (gigglechittered) “I doubt they will last that long. Right now it is true that I have few possessions, but there is still something very important I need to make sure is taken care of.”

---

“WNN. Our top headline this hour: Al-den Bush-E-tail has died. The small, wild cousin-like squirrel served in his role as Embassader of the Terran Nah-mah-cant-ah Free Squirrels for more than forty years. We’ll have a remembrance after the rest of our headlines…”

Someone pressed the door buzzer interrupting the news. The pine marten got off his cushion to answer the door. Outside, stood a ferret dressed in a business suit and tie with a small hover cargo pod by his side.

“Can I help you?”

The ferret bowed. “I am Elizus with the Mustelid Law Firm in Forestal. Is Mr. Ehnray home?”

The pine marten wiped a tear from his eye. “Yes, my father is here. He is his death bed. The doctor gives him a day or two at most. He’s currently resting asking us to leave him be for a little while.”

The ferret frowned. “I see. My father represented him in court forty some odd years ago. After that case, he was hired on by the Nahmakanta Free Squirrel Embassy on retainer. I took that job over after his retirement ten years ago. Father passed away two year ago, so I know what you’re going through. My condolences.” The ferret briefly bowed again.

“It was just announced on WNN that the Embassahder died.”

“Yes, he passed yesterday evening local time of natural causes. That is why I’m here. Your father is in the late Embassahder’s will. And should he pass, it goes to you and any of your surviving siblings. May I come in?”

The pine marten motioned him in. The cargo container followed a short distance behind the ferret.

“What is that?”

“The inheritance from the Embassahder. Is Mr. Ehnray lucid enough for a visitor?”

“We’ll see.” The pine marten led the ferret into a back room where Ehnray lay semi-curled up on a hammock bed breathing shallowly. His son went over to his side and touched his hand. “Father you have a visitor.”

Ehnray opened his eyes and focused on the ferret. “Do I know you?” he rasped.

“No, but you knew my father, Mr. Enhray. He represented you in court many years ago.”

Ehnray’s eyes widened a little. “Yes, I remember.” He breathed in and out a bit trying to build up a bit of strength. “You look just like your father and if I had known him while I was in the hospital, I would never have been found guilty. If I remember, after the trail, the Embassahder hired him. How is the Embassahder these days?”

“I’m sorry to say, Mr. Ehnray, he died last night. That is why I’m here.”

Ehnray blinked a couple times. “Really? I outlived him?”

“Yes. And he left you in his will. While, I find what he did highly unusual, I must respect my client’s wishes.” The ferret tapped an icon on his flatpanel. A quite young Aldin appeared on the entertainment panel on the wall.

“Hello Ehnray, or his survivors should I have outlived him.” Aldin’s tail flicked about briefly like he was waving it. “This part of my will I set in place about a week after you were granted clemency. If you are watching this, then I have passed onto whatever lays beyond this life. Among your people, cremation is the normal way your remains are disposed of. That is not the way of my people. We are not far removed from our wild cousin ancestors and remember our roots as a prey creature. Normally, we lay our dead in the open in the forest for predators and carrion eaters to consume.

“However, I recall in the trial how you said how much you enjoyed the taste of wild cousin squirrel. You asked that we never meet muzzle-to-muzzle again because I smelled like a tasty wild cousin squirrel to you, and you feared you would do me harm if we met again. And so I offer you my body so you can enjoy the taste of wild cousin “tree rat” one more time. Well,” Aldin shrugged, “pretty close to it anyway. I would be honored if you were the predator to consume my remains. If you want nothing to do with this, I understand and hope I have not caused offense. In that case, my counsel will transport my remains to a forest preserve and lay them in the open.” The screen went dark.

Enhray started to laugh hard and uncontrollably, which turned into a coughing fit.

While Enhray coughed, his son declared, “That’s disgusting! Didn’t that tree rat cause enough harm to my father all those years ago! How dare he do this!”

“That little shit!” Enhray stammered between coughs and shook his head giggling some more.

“Excuse me, Father, what was that last word?”

“That was Ing-lish,” Elizus responded. “The late Embassahder’s native language. If I remember right, it is a slang term for scat.”

Enhray nodded at Elizus, looked at his son and rasped, “Alonzo, there is nothing disgusting about his request. His people are different than ours...” He closed his eyes a moment and caught his breath. “As I learned over time. A few months after the trial, he checked in on me via video. We talked regularly for over a year after that. He respected my request not to visit in person.” He paused catching his breath. “I learned a lot about him and his people. In the process of those video conversations, we taught each other a few cuss words and their context in each other’s languages. ‘Shit’ is a mild cuss word in his Ing-lish. I also learned a few things I would never dare utter for fear it would summon your mother’s spirit from the next life long enough to smack me.” He chuckled again and closed his eyes in thought.

“I will honor the Embassahder’s last request.” He paused a moment. “We’ll stew him. As old as he is, a slow cook method will ensure he is nice and tender when served. Alonzo, you and your siblings, mates, children and any grandkits on hand will join me. You haven’t lived until you’ve eaten wild cousin squirrel, even if it is just one small taste as there won’t be much meat on him, maybe a third of a kilo in total. The Embassahder may not have been a wild cousin, but he was awful close to being one. He smelled like one. I’ll bet he tastes like one.” Ehnray drooled a little.

As instructed all of Ehnray’s family present had some of the stew with their father that evening. He was more animated than he had been in some time as he ate the squirrel stew. They would agree that squirrel was delicious.

---

“WNN. Our top headline this hour, Ehnray the Pine Marten, who once attempted to kill the late Embassahder Aldin Bush-E-tail, has died, just two days after the Embassahder. After the rest of the headlines, we’ll have a remembrance of this would-be assassin who was granted clemency for his crime…”

FIN

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Author’s notes:

No, that isn’t the end of my story telling with Aldin. However, he insisted that you, the readers, know this part of his will. Considering my family history, timeline-wise, I guess he plans to outlive me (chuckle) as an addition 40-some-odd years would put me a good decade plus beyond the maximum age any male member of my family has lived to date.