FIVE

“Hey, ‘Representative Tree-Rat’! You’ve got a visitor!” The raccoon guard called out as he led Aldin through a clear heavy polycarbonate plastic doorway.

Aldin’s fur bristled as he glared at the guard. “I take offense to that term, officer, and will not tolerate such language from you. I hear it from you again, and I will file a complaint with your superior. You will address your prisoner by his real name.”

The coon shrugged. “As you wish, Embassahder. But as you’ll find he’ll ignore us. Enhray! Visitor for you!” The coon set a pillow down outside a barred cell for Aldin and exited through the plastic door, which locked behind him. The coon sat beyond that door where he could watch both Aldin and the prisoner.

Aldin sat on the pillow and looked through the very human-like barred cell, except these bars were polycarbonate instead of steel. Inside a curled-up brown, furry form lay on the pallet. Aldin cleared his throat.

“Go away,” mumbled the form.

“This is quite the,” Aldin paused trying to come-up with the word in Common, “pickle, would be the Terran term, you’ve got yourself in On-ray.”

This time Enhray poked his head up and stared at Aldin a moment. “You!?” He sighed and lowered his head again. “Go away, Tree Rat.”

“That’s Ambassador ‘Tree Rat’ to you, On-ray, or simply Aldin, your pick.”

Enhray sighed as he curled up again. “I have no interest in talking to you.”

“Nor anyone else, apparently.”

“Go away,” Enhray mumbled again. “Leave me be.”

“Why? So you can throw your life away in self-pity?”

Enhray didn’t bother replying this time and simply ignored him.

“Your wife, Fill-is, called, On-ray. She was very plez-ant to talk to. She told me everything, On-ray.”

Enhray didn’t even twitch.

“Fill-is still loves you. That’s why she called me hoping I would help. She’d prefer to have you home rather than to divorce you. She’ll be forced to do so soon if you stay here. Your kids need their father at home, On-ray.”

Enhray continued to ignore him.

“I am not going to leave just because you’re ignoring me, On-ray.” Aldin quietly scampered over to the electronic lock on the cell. He held his paw over it a moment, and as he expected, the light on it changed from purple to green. Aldin entered the cell, closing the door behind him and the light on the lock changed back to purple. Aldin scampered over to Enhray’s curled-up form and lightly poked him on the shoulder. “In fact, I am not leaving without some answers, On-ray.”

As Aldin did this, the coon guard fumbled with the outer door as he called out, “What the?!” He scrambled into the inner chamber drawing his sidearm. “How did you do that?! Get out of there! He already tried to kill you once!” The coon aimed his weapon pass Aldin at Enhray and the ready light on it turned off. He stared at it in disbelief. He lowered it and the light came on. He pointed it pass Aldin at Enhray and it turned off again. He banged the side of it a few times with his other paw. Whenever he didn’t have it pointed at his intended target, the ready light came on, but it turned off as soon as he pointed it again at Aldin and Enhray. He pulled out his personal flat panel with his free hand, tapped an icon, and yelled into it. “I’ve got a situation down here in Heraldes Block. I need back-up, now!”

Meanwhile, Enhray had jumped back startled by being poked on the shoulder. Aldin simply sat on the edge of the pallet and patted the space next to him.

“Come on, let’s chat.”

Enhray cussed. Aldin twitched his ears. It drove him nuts. Regardless of how much he worked on learning Common, cuss words seemed to pass in one ear and out the other without registering. He heard them, but couldn’t remember them. Maybe it was because he didn’t know the context of the slang used.

“You’re one crazy tree rat,” Enhray paused and added afterward, “Aldin.” He shot his hands in the air once he saw that the coon guard had a weapon pointed at him. “I don’t want any trouble, officer!”

“Finally, we’re getting somewhere.” Aldin glanced over at the guard. “That’s not necessary, officer. You can go back to sitting outside the other door.”

Other guards rushed into the outer chamber. As each drew their weapon, the ready light shut-off whenever they pointed it at Enhray, who was partially blocked by where Aldin sat on the pallet. Like the coon, they each stared in disbelief as the light would turn on if they lowered their weapon or pointed it elsewhere, and turn off when pointed at Enhray.

“Embassahder, please exit the cell for your own safety,” the coon pleaded.

“I am perfectly safe. You can put your weapons away. Mr. On-ray is no threat to me.” Aldin got up off his end of the pallet and moved closer to Ehnray. “I could turn my back to him and I’d be fine.” He did so.

Again, Enhray cussed. “Keep away from me, tree rat! I’m already in here for five years. You’re trying to get more time added to it, aren’t you?” Enhray continued to hold his paws up where the guards could see them and backed as far into the corner as he could on the pallet and away from Aldin. “As I already said, I don’t want any trouble, officers. The Em-bass-ah-der,” Enhray struggled with the unfamiliar word, “has lost his mind. I don’t know how he got in my cell.”

“They cannot harm you with their weapons, On-ray. s long as I am in this cell and breathing as I am in the line of fire. As the appointed Ambassador of the Terran Nahmakanta Free Squirrels, I have, I am not sure of the word in Common. In English it is ‘diplomatic immunity’ to Earth laws. Basically, your laws do not apply to me. As most everything here seems to be tied together through the world computer network, including the lock to your cell and their ‘smart’ weapons,” he pointed at the guards with his tail, “that makes it easy for me to,” he paused thinking of the word he needed, “flaunt, I think is the word. I can flaunt that immunity if I choose to do so. They can point their weapons at us all day long, pull the trigger and nothing will happen.” Aldin shrugged. “They’re no concern or danger to you while I am in here. And I am not going to leave you alone until you agree to talk with me.”

“Please, Embassahder, get away from him,” the coon again pleaded. “You aren’t safe in there.”

“Office, I am in no real danger here just as I was in no real danger back on the floor of Parliament when he leapt at me. He could lift me by the scruff of the neck, and I would still not be in danger.” Aldin continued to keep his back to Ehnray and got close enough to where the pine marten could easily grab him as described. He turned his head a bit sideways to be able to see the marten. “Go ahead and pick me up, On-ray. I trust you, though they do not.”

Again, Enhray cussed as he was cornered. He couldn’t back away any further and he couldn’t dart around Aldin.

“I am not leaving your cell, On-ray, unless you either talk to me or you remove me from it.” The defiant squirrel stomped a foot for emphasis.

Enhray looked at the squirrel and then the guards. One eye and ear twitched a moment. Finally, he lowered his right hand and grasping Aldin by the scruff of the neck, slowly and easily lifted him. The small squirrel neither resisted nor so much as flinch as he dangled in Enhray’s grasp.

The guards all repeatedly cried out at Enhray, “PUT THE EMBASSAHDER DOWN!” while pointing their weapons at him, clicking them uselessly.