I've basically ranted about this same thing before but it's gotten me kind of pissed again and there's really nothing else I can do about it so have some lines.

There are some games that I really love that can be played competitively. Super Smash Bros. For Wii U is the prime example of one. I've played the Smash games since I was 5 or so. The first Smash game was one of the first games I ever even played. Now, normally games like that are the most fun when you play them with someone, and even though that's the subject of this rant I still think that's true.

The problem is when the people you COULD have the most fun playing against are all a league or two above you.

Now, don't get me wrong—I don't get upset just from losing a match or two, especially when it's against someone I don't know or if it's in a tournament or whatever. I don't care about tournaments. They're fun and all that but it's not something I can see myself pursuing much. I don't even honestly care about getting super good at playing the game competitively. Honestly, all I want to even do is be on the same skill level as my closest friends and boyfriend so we can all have fun playing my favorite game again like we used to.

I know I really shouldn't be upset that they're better at the game than me, and that I shouldn't care about how the matches go, but for some reason I can't NOT care. I keep trying really hard to get better and catch up to them, but every time I get close it seems like the gap in skill just gets wider than it was before. And when I keep losing over and over and over and over again, worse and worse each time than the last, can anyone really blame me for getting frustrated? Is it not reasonable to want to be on an even playing field? Wouldn't it feel unfair if you were the one trying your hardest to win just 5 out of 10 matches and getting nowhere near that goal after a year or more?

The easiest option seems to be just not playing anymore, but I don't want to accept that. I don't want to give up playing one of my favorite games of all time with my favorite person of all time. So I keep trying and I keep losing and getting more frustrated. Kind of a vicious circle I've gotten myself trapped in. I really don't know what I can do at this point. I've looked at every tutorial video I can find of the characters I play and tried to take them into account. I've switched up my playstyle as much as I can seem to manage, picked up new tricks and good habits, dropped bad ones, played on Anther's Ladder plenty of times and lost there too... I don't know. It just feels hopeless and sometimes it makes me really upset.

Vi © VibrantEchoes