greetings all! i hope you're seasons are going okay.
last month I wanted to try to do too many things and ended up needing to focus on school and working through taking care of myself. spending time with family and working on my diet and health has been my priority, but now i just really feel like i need to hole up in a corner and scribble. this school work has left my eyes and body exhausted every day from aerobic and dance theory work, and now that it's done i really want to get back to focusing on my art and stories.
i've gotten a therapist and that is seeming to help things; having someone to talk through about irrational thoughts or uncontrollable reactions or not being able to get to sleep at night or finding out how to deal with your family is really good. these kind of things are what i've been addressing since summer and finally after last year i talked with my family and got up the courage to find one.
i've come to realize i've grown very disassociated from my own self, feelings and somewhat body. i will be present only so much of the time, mostly i'm concerned with something in the future or how another person may feel or one of any event currently happening. my own rhythms are a mystery and i've had to piece back together my daily actions. i feel like there are so many options and i don't know which is right for me, and that to figure that out requires living for a long period of time and just learning what i work with.
i've disassociated so hard because god damn i feel like i need a break. i feel spent on a real physical level but also like... goddamn family like... i'm super fucking socially spent too.
i'm trying to do more art in my sketchbooks, a lot of it's in pencil and on paper and on instagram @angeunge and not a lot of them are finished gallery pieces. scribbles and sketches and studies are what i've been up to mostly.
but i've been thinking of making everything into a comic instead of writing solely in prose word. so i guess that'll be something to look forward to in pictures.