When I came out almost two years ago, things didn't go so well. It could've been much worse, since I wasn't shunned or kicked out or forced into anything, but my family was very upset and refused to really acknowledge my identity. My mom would buy me men's clothes and deodorant and whatnot, and while I appreciated that very much, it was stuff I could have done on my own, but the name/pronouns really hurt. My dad flat-out refused. My extended family either didn't know (and my anxiety issues wouldn't let me speak up) or also refused.

Needless to say, this time of year had me pretty damn worried. Between my birthday, Christmas, and New Years, plus very large families on both sides, I was looking forward to one family gathering after another full of lectures, disrespect, dysphoria, and (hopefully) accidental misgendering.

December 18th was my 21st birthday. I started the day off getting a card from my uncle. It was addressed to Alex and used the word "nephew". I was thrilled. I got happy birthday texts from my aunt and grandma, both calling me Alex. The card from my parents said Alex, as did my birthday cake. It all felt so amazing. The highlight of the day though was when my dad walked into the living room and said to my mom, completely off-handedly, "Hey, did you show Alex the [internet video]?" I just sort of stared at him in shock for a minute because he's been such a...well frankly, a dick about it since day 1, and yet he was the first one to say it casually out loud.

It's such an uplifting feeling and holy crap such a RELIEF to see people I care about actually making the effort. I know people will slip up and that doesn't bother me in the slightest. There's still a long way to go for a lot of them but for the first time I'm not worried about it at all. They're TRYING and it feels amazing and it makes me want to cry.

I don't expect any response for this but I figured with all the negative crap we hear about trans folks all the time it could be nice to hear something positive. And maybe it'll give some of you with less supportive loved ones a little bit of hope. If they truly care about you, they'll learn to respect you.

Happy holidays, good luck, and much love to you all